Just like a tight ring
by howimetyourswarkles
Summary: AU - Barney and Quinn got engaged and Robin decided to leave NYC. But what will happen when she will come back to the Big Apple... with a new love? P.S. I'm not English,so sorry for possible language mistakes! x
1. Coming back

**AN: _So, hello to you all! This is my first fanfiction and I really hope you'll read it and tell me what do you think about it. Every advice is appreciated. ;_****_)_**

**_V._**

* * *

Two years had passed since Robin Scherbatsky had stepped on the tarmac of New York for the last time. It was a May's sultry Friday and, after that Barney Stinson , his friend and her ex -boyfriend , was officially engaged to Quinn, she had taken a painful but necessary decision : she had to leave.

She had tried to act as if the thing wasn't causing her heavy pain , but she couldn't lie to herself. Not after she had heard the tears flowing on her face looking at the box full of memories of her relationship with Barney. Yeah, Barney. Who had once again managed to surprise her :

" 622 West, 14th street ," he said , giving her a key. A key that opened a store, where there was what he had jealously kept for years - photos, souvenirs , notes. Everything . And Robin could not stand that situation . She couldn't cry thinking about her ex that he was now in the arms of his new fiancé.

No.

So she took the chance , accepting a position as lead anchor in the biggest Canadian sports channel .

And after three months since her return to the motherland, she met Jake Koczynsky , one of the most famous Canadian journalists of all time. They clicked immediately and they started dating. In addition, it must be said , Jake was really handsome. His big blue eyes mesmerized Robin since their first meeting and the rest was no less : black and short hair ,and aw, his lips that makes you want to kiss them 24/7.

Two years had passed and now Robin was returning to New York. With Jake . And big news . Robin was excited by the idea of seeing her old friends - Ted , Marshall, Lily and why not .. Barney and Quinn. Robin had expressly asked Ted , Marshall and Lily not to give news about Barney and his marriage, at least until she would have been better about the whole situation. The three friends obeyed , despite some vacillation from Lily's part that for a period had done nothing but repeat her friend, "you need to know this thing about Barney and Quinn ". However, Robin didn't want to know , she just wanted to move on. And now, finally, she made it. She was ready to meet Barney and his wife with all the happiness possible.

Robin and Jake arrived at McLaren 's at 9pm.

" Oh, so here is where you lost the best years of your life ", Jake joked , entering in the pub after Robin .

" Ha-ha , really funny . You 're in New York from just few hours, but you're getting annoyingly acid already!", Jake smiled and stroked gently her hair .

The two arrived at the table where Robin used to meet the gang and in fact Lily , Marshall, Ted and Sarah (yes, Ted finally found his soul mate ) were sitting there, waiting for them . Marvin wasn't there, Lily's dad was taking care of him, like the greatest of nannies.

" Hey , finally! " , Lily exclaimed , noticing the arrival of the couple . She ran up to hug Robin. " I missed you so much! "

"Oh, I missed you too! And all of you! " , Robin said , visibly moved .

The following minutes were classics: hugs and kisses and a brief report of their past two years.

" Wow , if I knew that Canadians were so handsome , I would have made that trip to Vancouver that was proposed to me ! " , Sarah said . Ted looked at her menacingly. "Come on,i'm joking , sweetie ! You're better than any handsome hockey player in the world! " she added , smiling . Ted could not resist her smile and kissed her softly.

" Guys, I do not want to sound rude but you have not yet tasted the Gouda that I brought all the way here just for you! ", Marshall intervened a bit offended.

" I told you that it was a bad idea ", Lily replied, resigned .

" Well, actually I would like a piece of Gouda, it looks fabulous ", Jake said , grabbing a piece of cheese and eating it ." Wow , it's awesome! "

" What? The cheese or Marshall's paradise face he's doing right now ? ", Robin asked , jokingly . They all laughed .

" So, Robin , talking about serious things ... what are these great news that you wanted to talk about ? ", Ted asked .

" Oh yeah , then ... hold on tight because it's more than one. First of all , Jake and I decided to come back to live here ".

" WOOOOO! ", Lily exclaimed.

" Lily , _indoor_ woooo! " Marshall intervened .

" Oh, sorry . Woooo ," she said, in a lower voice .

Robin smiled. It was nice to see that her friends had remained the same as they once were. " And the second big new is that ... um .." Robin grabbed Jake's hand. " We're engaged! "

The whole gang shouted for joy and congratulated the couple.

" You deserve it , Robin. I'm really happy for you!" , Ted said , in a sincere way.

" Thanks, Ted ",

" Come on, we want to see that great piece of jewelry that your boyfriend has put into your finger ! " , Sarah said excitedly.

" Um, actually I do not have the engagement ring now."

" Yeah, it was too tight . So, before coming here , we brought to enlarge it ", Jake intervened .

" Oh, well ... then I can't wait to see it! "

" You'll be the first , Sarah ," said Robin , smiling .

Ted 's phone rang.

" No, dude . For the umpteenth time , I'm not going to play strip - laser tag . Because I have a girlfriend who definitely doesn't like it, that's why. No. .. I don't think she wants to come .. unless there are handsome Canadian boys, perhaps " , Ted was still a bit offended by the comments on Jake by Sarah , who raised her arms puffing : " I was joking ! "

Ted hang up after saying goodbye to his interlocutor .

" Still with the strip- laser tag, huh?", Lily asked .

" Yeah . He is going out of control. I'm starting to worry about him ".

" Excuse me, but what is happening? Strip- laser tag ? What the hell? ", Robin intervened , not understanding what it was going on.

" Well, it's Barney ", Lily said .

Of course . It could be no one but him. Laser tag could be his second last name , how he loved it. And Robin liked it, too. That night when they went together to play it, to smoke cigars, having fun. Memories that seemed lost forever and now , slowly, were returning to the surface.

" Yeah, since he broke up with Quinn he's no longer the same. He says he is happy with his single life, but I don't think so", Ted said.

Robin jumped. She heard right ? Barney and Quinn broke up? She was convinced she would see them walking in McLaren 's holding hands by any minute but ... no. They were not together anymore.

" What .. whe .. when Barney and Quinn broke up? " , Robin asked, beginning to feel a strange nervousness walk through her body.

"Five months after their engagement ", Lily said. " That 's what I was trying to say during our conversations via Skype. But you didn't want to listen ".

Robin could hardly breath. And she couldn't understand why. Okay, Barney was single again . Quinn wasn't in the picture anymore. But why? What happened? They seemed so in love. Yeah, in love. Just like her and Jake. And now she was there, sitting next to the man she loved and the friends she loved.

But without an engagement ring. It was too tight for her.

In that pub, she suddenly felt just like that ring : too tight. To breath. To think.


	2. The Number Sixteen

**AN:****_ This chapter is short but it was necessary. The next one will be longer and... definitely more interesting! _**

_**V.**_

* * *

It was late at night now. Jake , tired 'cause the trip , had fallen asleep into the arms of Morpheus as soon as he touched the pillow. While he was sleeping peacefully in the bed of their new apartment in New York that he had bought years ago and never used , Robin couldn't sleep. She had counted sheep , the players of the Vancouver Canucks ( plus the reserves) , but nothing. And now she found herself staring at the ceiling waiting for a miracle. And the fact that she did not believe in miracles made it a good idea of how much desperate she was.

_Barney and Quinn broke up ._

That phrase echoed in her brain since they left McLaren 's. Barney didn't come to the pub to meet her and Robin , although she would never admit it , suffered it. She wanted to see him, knowing what it happened with Quinn and how he was feeling . But nothing . What she knew was just he was playing a strip- laser tag in a competition for adults only. Classic Barney.

" Perhaps this is the reason for their break-up ", Robin thought. "Maybe Barney has not been able to change. I mean... strip- laser tag, really? "  
Robin turned to Jake who was sleeping like an angel. She smiled, thinking how lucky she was to have met someone who was ready for a serious commitment and who asked her to marry him. And how, equally devoid of hesitation , she told him yes.  
Jake and Robin . Simply . Without any drama or misunderstanding . Their story was a fairytale but now she stood there thinking about Barney. It was ridiculous, wasn't it?  
" Dammit , Scherbatsky , enough with the autosabotages!", she admonished herself and, looking at Jake, she slowly fell asleep.

* * *

Barney came home from his strip- laser tag competition from few hours . He wanted to go to the pub and meet Robin , but in the end he decided that was not the case . He was not at his best and certainly everyone, including Robin, would have noticed that he had something wrong . Sure, since the first day everyone said he was a strange guy, but this was a different situation. A different discomfort . When he broke up with Quinn, Barney decided that he would never fall in love, again . Too much suffering. And so, he resumed his old life , full of bimbos , drinks and plays .  
But Barney was not happy. He felt lost . All his friends were happily in love , and although they did their best to stay close to him , he felt alone. And desperate . His old life did not satisfy him anymore . A life that before he considered awesome , but which now was just sad.  
Barney sat on the couch after filling a glass of scotch. With his other hand he pulled out his cell phone from his pants pocket . There was a message from Lily:

_" Robin and Jake will not go back in Canada. They're gonna stay here . Oh, and they're engaged . I thought you wanted to know . "_

Robin engaged to that anonymous guy? Really?

" I mean .. he wears blazers , what a douche ! ", Barney thought . In fact, he saw some pictures of Jake on Robin's facebook page and he didn't like him.  
He read the message several times. And every time he read the words _" Robin and Jake "_ and _" engaged"_ , Barney sipped a glass of scotch.

* * *

The next morning, Robin was waking up but when she stretched out an arm to reach Jake , she realized that his side of the bed was empty. She opened her eyes and saw a post-it on his pillow:

_"Honey , I'm sorry if we can't have breakfast together but unfortunately the business call . See you later . I love you . J"_

Robin smiled and after a refreshing shower , she went to the kitchen to have breakfast . She opened the fridge and found herself in front of ... nothing. It was completely empty. They were in NYC from yesterday and they hadn't had time to buy something.  
" Well, this does not look good ," Robin said , closing the fridge . She was starving , so she decided to go out and go to one of her favorite bars where she loved having breakfast ,_ The Number Sixteen_ .

Barney woke up in the middle of one of the worst hangovers of his life. He could not work properly without a good cup of coffee . He was late and work was waiting for him, but he didn't really want to go out. In fact, he didn't even know if he was able to walk properly , but he decided that it was essential, otherwise he would have found himself in a daze all day . So, after a quick shower, he took courage and went out, headed for the bar where he usually went before going to work.

Yeah, _The Number Sixteen_ .


	3. The Mirror Knows Better

**AN: _Here I am with the third chapter! First of all, I wanna thank you all for the nice reviews, when I started writing I thought no one would read my story so I am really happy. Thank you thank you thank you so much. I hope you'll enjoy this chapter as well. ;)_**

**_V._**

* * *

Robin was finally at her favorite table , the one near the large window from which you could see the beautiful view of New York which she missed so much . Sure, the donuts were not exactly like those of Tim Horton's, but she didn't complain, tasting a stuffed cherry one while sipping a cup of hot coffee that miraculously was waking her up. Her happy moment got suddenly interrupted by the ringing of her cell phone. She saw the screen, it was Jake. Robin smiled and answered.

" Hello? "  
" Hi, sweetie. You're awake already? "  
" Yes, I am having breakfast at The Number Sixteen."  
" Well, it will be the last breakfast that you will be forced to have at a bar. I just finished the interview and I'm going to the supermarket."  
" Oh, really? ", she asked, not happy about it.  
" What's wrong? "  
" Nothing."  
" Robin .. "  
" Okay, is that when you go to buy something, you always come back with sad, dietetics things".  
" Sad? "  
" Yes, sad. Sad vegetables, sad fruit... a few months ago I'm sure I heard a broccoli crying in the kitchen."  
" Okay, okay. I got it. I will try to buy only happy things, are you satisfied? "  
" Yes! "  
" See you later, then. I love you ".  
" Bye ".

Robin hung up the phone and leaned it on the table. She took the last sip of coffee and ate the last piece of her donut, then she opened her purse and pulled out a handkerchief to wipe her hands. She looked out of the window, realizing how happy she was to be in NYC again. She closed her purse and walked out of the bar.  
Walking home, a distance of less than 10 minutes from the bar , Robin remembered she had to call Sarah to confirm her presence at the night at her and Ted's place. She tried to pull out the phone from the right pocket of her pants, but she realized that it was empty. She checked the other pocket. Empty. So she opened her purse and, after check it, she realized she had left the phone on the table in the bar.  
" Oh, damn!", she whispered , before turning and running towards the bar to recuperate the object.

* * *

Robin went back into the bar out of breath. She walked over to the table that she loved so much, even if right now she was cursing it. Above there, there was nothing except for a cup of coffee. She checked below, between the chairs, around. Nothing. They must have stolen it, damn. It was even a gift from Jake ..  
But Robin did not give up and went to the check desk, wanting to ask the cashier if someone gave them the phone or if they saw someone sit at that table.

" Yeah, I found it at my table. I have no idea who's the owner".  
Robin froze when she heard that voice. She was there, on her way to the check desk, only one customer in front of her. But the one who was talking to the cashier at that moment, was not just a simple customer. And his voice was a confirmation of that. Tall, in a suit, blond short hair. God, she would recognize that hair anywhere. So shiny and soft to touch.  
Her breathing started to become labored.

" Maybe they haven't forgotten it, they just have abandoned it. I mean... a phone with the cover of the Canadian flag, really? Oh, these Canadians ... they come here and invade us with their stupid objects!"  
" You should be nicer to your compatriots", Robin finally said in a single breath .  
Barney became suddenly serious. That voice. He looked down and then raised his head again when he turned around. It was not a hallucination . He really heard that voice. And she was there. She. Robin. Barney couldn't help but smiling at her. He was glad to see that she had not changed at all. Especially the hair, short like the last time he saw her. He loved the haircut that showed off her gorgeous face, that personified her strong and a little tomboy personality, and which he could not resist to . She was definitely the most beautiful woman he had ever seen, no matter what. And now she was there, in front of him, visibly nervous.

" Well, well, well... hi ", he said to her.  
" Hi ". Robin didn't know what to say or how to behave, it was a delicate situation. " Um ... the phone is mine, by the way ," she added, trying to break the tension that was being created .  
" Of course , only you could own a thing like this ," quipped Barney, giving the phone to Robin who took it, ending up touching Barney's hand. A fleeting touch but which was enough to make her feel a strange chill down her spine.  
" So .. ", Barney said, trying to find a starting point for the conversation.  
" So..." , Robin replied, undecided about what to say.  
" I ... I 'm happy to see you," Barney said , with a deeper voice than the one he normally used . That tone of voice that he used only with Robin.  
" So am I ," Robin said , with a brief smile .  
The two stayed in silence for a few seconds that seemed to be an eternity.  
" It 's a bit strange, isn't it? ", Robin asked.  
" Yeah ", Barney said , scratching his head.  
" It should not be like that, I mean ... it's true, we haven't seen each other for a while, but - ", Robin didn't have time to finish the sentence because Barney hugged her without any warning. Robin felt puzzled, not expecting it . His arms wrapped her completely.  
"Is it okay huggin' an engaged woman like this? ", Barney asked , genuinely concerned that he just made a stupid move, but with his arms still wrapped on her.  
" Yes, it's okay", she assured him, smiling.  
" Good. I missed you, Scherbatsky ."  
"I missed you too ." And that was the moment where she let her feelings run their course and tightly hugged him back with her hands on his wrapped on shoulders. She was so close to tearing up. Over the past two years all that she had wanted was that hug . The decision to interrupt any contact with Barney had been more difficult than she expected and she would lie if she said that she hadn't hoped to see Barney appear at the door of her home in Canada, ready to take her back to New York.  
" Listen , you got a minute? ", Barney said , breaking the hug.  
" Um, yes" , replied Robin.  
" Good " .  
The two walked to the table. Yes, the one near the window.  
" So, what's new? " , Robin asked .  
" Um ,nothing. I broke up with Quinn and now I am committed to spreading my awesomeness in every pub and stripclub in the NYC area, if you know what I mean ."  
" Yeah , more than I would like to know".  
" And what about you? "  
" Oh well , I.. I got engaged ."  
" Yes, I know that ."  
" You do ? "  
" Hello - I asked you a few seconds ago if it was okay to hug an engaged woman ! "  
" Oh, right. I forgot". Robin was lyin'. She didn't forget. She simply didn't heard that piece of sentence . That hug made her lost the sense of reality.  
" God, first the cell phone, then this .. I have the impression that the day of the wedding I'll have to remind you the name of the groom!"  
" I didn't sleep much last night, okay? "  
" Hey, hey, hey. I don't wanna know about your creepy canadian sexual intercourses!"  
" I wasn't talking about that", she said.  
" I know. So the lucky One is the guy of your photos on Facebook ? "  
" Yes, Jake".  
" He's not photogenic ".  
" It's not important! "  
" Well, we'll see if you'll still think that when you'll open the wedding album ."  
" I don't think you should worry about it".  
" So I suppose I shouldn't worry about the fact that you aren't wearing any ring either". Yes, 'cause Barney noticed that Robin was not wearing any ring on her finger.

Robin sighed. " Barney ..."

" What happened, Jake spent all his money in questionable blazers and he couldn't buy you one? "  
"Of course he bought me one! We took it to make it enlarge because it was too tight".  
"Such a loser ."  
" Stop it ."  
" I'm sorry. But c'mon... the blazers ! "  
Robin laughed. Barney was the only one who could make her laugh anytime. "You're an idiot", she added, shaking her head and givin' him a smile. Barney looked at her questioningly.

_When she tells you that you're an idiot, it means that she loves you._

And in an instant he remembered when she told him that on the stairs that autumn evening, after they discussed. He remembered that his heart exploded with joy when he heard those words coming from her mouth. She loved him and so did he. He had never felt happier that way. And now, those words were out of her mouth again. But she could not love him this time. It was unthinkable, she was engaged. So why the feeling of happiness he felt on the stairs that night, had suddenly come back? Barney began to become strained, and Robin finally realized what she just said. The words got out of her mouth without asking any permission. And she realized that Barney was not remained indifferent to that.  
" Um...sorry Scherbatsky , I would love to stay here and make fun of you and your out-of-style fiancè, but I'm awfully late", he hastily said.  
" Oh, yeah... okay, no problem" .  
" See you, bye ".  
" Bye " .  
Barney stood up and walked toward the exit. But, before opening the door, he turned to Robin, who was still sitting at the table.  
" Um, Robin?"  
" Yeah ? "  
" Congratulations ", he said with a little smile.  
" Thanks ", she replied smiling.

* * *

Barney was at work when someone knocked at his door.  
" Come in", he said.  
The door opened. It was Ted.  
" Hey , Barney ... remember about tonight ".  
" Yeah, it's a _bit hard_ to remember since you've been sayin' that to me all morning ."  
" That's because you always give the impression that you really don't listen to people when you 're not interested. So at 8 pm, okay? "  
" What happens at 8pm ? "  
" Dude ! "  
" Relax , I was joking ."  
Ted looked suspisciously at Barney and got out.  
" Trish , go to Ted Mosby's office and find out what happens at 8pm , please", Barney said to her secretary by intercom.

It had not been a quiet morning for Barney. That meeting with Robin left him a weird feeling. He missed her so much, and although they promised to keep in touch, that didn't happen. Barney didn't understand what were the real reasons of her decision to leave. He didn't know if it was really because she had an important job offer , or if there was more than that . He baked in the doubts that it might have been a little because of him and his engagement. It 's true, Robin told him that she was happy for him, but there was something wrong in her voice, in her eyes . But then, all those worries vanished when he realized that if Robin still had feelings for him, she would tell him. And now he was at his desk realizing that no, Robin was not in love with him, anymore. She was going to marry another man. And he was happy for her. The problem was another: was he happy for himself? Did he make a mistake to let her go? However, the answer didn't matter because it was too late.

* * *

Jake and Robin were preparing to go to Ted and Sarah's . Robin was still in a bathrobe, and tried in vain to find something to wear.  
" C'mon , we aren't going to the Oscar's Ceremony , put the first thing that you find and let's go", Jake said, coming into the bedroom and seeing his girlfriend discard the various clothes in the closet.  
" Ok, I will go there dressed like this, what do you say ? ", she joked.  
" Oh,I would not complain", Jake walked over to the closet. "Come on, I'll help you ..." .

Robin's phone rang. It was Sarah.

"Oh Sarah, I'm so sorry, I forgot to call you earlier, but Jake and I will be there... yes, totally!", she apologized.  
"Perfect, and don't worry... we aren't sure if Barney will come over, yet! Yes, he said he will, but who knows!", Sarah said.  
Robin was almost incredulous. "Oh, so... you invited Barney".  
"Yeah, of course we did. Is it a problem?"  
Of course they invited Barney, it's their friend, why shouldn' they? Robin tried to keep it cool, but her voice became strangely loud. "No, no. Absolutely not. It's superfine, amazing, wooo!"  
"Are you okay?"  
"Yes, yes. So... see you later!"  
"Okay, bye!"  
"Bye!"

" Oh , look at this dress, so sexy ! ", Jake said, pulling it out a purple leopard print dress from the closet. Robin turned her head and she couldn't believe what she was looking at. That one was not a random dress. It was the dress that she wore at Punchy's wedding. The dress of her dance with Barney. The dress she wore when she realized that she and Barney " belonged together ". And the same lead character outfit of a classic Cyrano moment, in which Robin sacrificed her own happiness for Barney's , during that phone call between him and Nora.  
" I hate it ! ", she screamed. Too many memories belonged to that dress, memories still so painful. And so, without even thinking about it, she literally tore the dress from Jake's hands and threw it away, without caring where it was going to end up.  
" Wow, what did that dress do to be treated that way ? "  
" Nothing ... um , is that it doesn't fit well, it makes me fat, ugly and bad ."  
" You? Fat, ugly and bad? Impossible! "  
"It 's very sweet for you to say this but ... I guarantee you that is the worst dress i've ever worn".  
" Okay, if you say so .. "  
" Anyway, I have found the perfect thing to wear ," Robin said , pulling out a white dress that fell just above her knees. That was one of her favorite clothes that she bought during her first week in Canada.  
" Oh, finally!"

* * *

Robin came out of the bedroom. Jake was on the couch and his mouth built up a big smile when she saw her.  
" You're beautiful ," he said, stooding up. She smiled and kissed him.  
" What are you doing with that rose ? " she asked, pointing the red rose he was holding in his hand.  
" A beautiful flower for a beautiful flower", he said.  
Robin froze. "What did you just say?"  
" I said a beautiful flower for a beautiful flower!"

It couldn't be true. That was the exact phrase Barney said to her and Lily when they went to that crazy Prom years ago. He gave them those wonderful wrist flowers and she could not help but being moved by the gesture. She had known Barney just from few months back then, but he had managed to scratch the impenetrable wall that she had raised in front of her.

"Did I say something wrong?", Jake asked, noticing that Robin's look was absent.  
Robin shook her head. "No, no, of course not. Thank you". She took the rose, tryin' to give him a sincere smile. "Wait, this rose isn't a real rose ", she said, noticing that the top of the rose was actually a small container.  
" Oh, really? " Jake asked, with mock incredulity .  
Robin opened the container and found inside her engagement ring.  
" I went to pick it up today," Jake said , pulling out the ring and threading it on her finger. " It seems that it fits perfectly now, right?", he asked.  
" So right".  
The two kissed.  
" Ok , I'll get the blazer and then we can go".  
Robin nodded. "Wait, the blazer ? ", she asked.  
" Yes, why? "  
" No, nothing. I love it! " Robin said holding back a laugh . She already knew that as soon as Barney would have seen that blazer , he'd begin to joke about it .  
Robin followed Jake in the bedroom where he put on his blazer while she looked herself in the mirror touching her engagement ring.  
" Now you will have no more reason to take it off ," he whispered to her, kissing her neck. She half-smiled, still staring at the mirror, but then she saw something with the corner of her eye. The purple dress, which was lyin' on the floor near the lamp.

Her half-smile died immediately.

"Yeah, there will be no more reason", she repeated, not sure at all of what she was sayin'.

"God, I hope Barney will be at a strip-laser tag competition, tonight", she thought.


	4. No, No

**AN: ****_Hello, guys! The fourth chapter is here... and it's an important one, even if it's short. Barney admits something to Robin and she could find herself in a classic "what if..." position. In the next chapter Robin will get some signs from destiny and who knows how she will react.._**

**_Thank you again for the reviews, keep 'em coming! _**

**_V._**

* * *

Jake and Robin arrived at Ted and Sarah's place in perfect time . Sarah greeted them with a tray of pastries, while Marshall and Lily , arrived a few minutes before them, had already begun to taste the cheese, with satisfied faces by Marshall, who was liking everything.

"Wow, I love this house" , Jake said, looking around.  
"Yeah, who would have thought that I would have really used it, eventually ! ", Ted said, smiling.  
" Ah, you have to know that Ted bought this house years before he met Sarah ", Robin explained.  
" Exactly, and everyone called me crazy and laughed about me. But now you do not laugh anymore, huh ? ", Ted replied proudly , hugging Sarah and giving her a kiss on the forehead . The other ones smiled , it was nice to see Ted finally happy .  
" Oh , it's better if I go to check the chicken in the oven , I don't wanna be forced to buy another home because of a fire! ", Sarah said , heading for the kitchen.  
" I'll help you ," Lily said , following her .

" Hey , Robin , have you seen the picture? " Ted asked , pointing to a photo hanging above the fireplace . Robin turned and smiled softly when she saw it . It was the first photo that the group of friends at McLaren 's. Robin knew Ted , Barney , Marshall and Lily for only a few weeks back then, yet they had become a family already. She looked so happy in that picture , and she realized that smile so sincere was no longer present in the recent photos portraying her and Jake .

" Wow, you guys were so young ! ", Jake intervened , noticing the photo. "Who is blondie ? " , he asked, noticing the presence of Barney next to Robin in the picture.  
" It's Barney " , Robin said .  
" Oh, the famous Barney , I hope to finally meet him tonight! ", Jake said .  
" I hope not ", Robin thought. She didn't know why, but the idea of having Barney and Jake in the same room made her nervous , especially after the purple dress and the phrase about the flowers that she had left full of questions .

Robin's hopes got destroyed in a second when she heard the bell ringing. Ted went to open the door .

" Hey buddy".  
" Hey , look at the clock. 8pm! ," Barney proudly said, entering the house .  
" Yeah , too bad that Trish told me that you had no idea what was going to happen tonight".  
" How ... "  
" You should hire a secretary who can't get corrupt with candy canes".  
" Dammit , Trish ! "  
Barney came into the living room and greeted Marshall.

The looks between Barney and Robin met.

" Hey", Barney said, a bit nervous .  
" Hey", she said , smiling nervously. Ted and Marshall stared at the two, noticing that there was something strange between them .  
" Um , I'm Jake , by the way ", Jake said , noticing that Robin didn't seem willing to introduce him to her friend. He held out his hand to Barney. He shook it.  
" I'm Barney", he said . " And.. you wear a blazer ."  
" Yeah, do you like it ? "  
" Jake, the only thing I love more than this blazer is Ralph Macchio ," Barney said, serious . Jake smiled, taking it as a compliment . Too bad he didn't know that Barney hated Ralph Macchio more than everything in the world . Ted , Marshall and Robin knew it and laughed , trying not to be discovered by the poor Jake.  
Lily and Sarah emerged from the kitchen with dishes of steaming in their hands and greeting Barney.  
" Just in time , dinner is ready! " Lily exclaimed.

* * *

"So , guys .. we have something new to tell you ", Ted said, grabbing Sarah's hand who was sitting next to him.

" What it is about ? " Marshall asked.

" Well ... I'm ... I'm pregnant! ", Sarah exclaimed, smiling enthusiastically. The whole gang shouted for joy , going to hug the two future parents.  
" Oh my god , Barney , are you cryin ' ? " Lily asked , noticing that his friend tried in vain to hide the tears .  
" No, I.. I. .. I'm Barney Stinson , I never cry ! " , Barney whimpered , genuinely moved by the news. Ted gave him a pat on the back , appreciating how much the friend cared for him and his happiness. Robin looked at Barney and smiled. She couldn't resist to his most sensitive part.  
" And after the birth of our baby, we'll get married", Ted added while Sarah showed her left hand , showing the engagement ring that she had to hide in her pocket to avoid arousing suspicion .  
The gang shouted for joy, again .  
" It 's great , this is ... fantastic! " , Marshall was euphoric.  
Ted and Sarah smiled and shared a tender kiss . There was a sweetness and happiness in that kiss that shook Robin . She envied them because she saw in them a serenity that she thought she had found with Jake but in reality what she had was crumbling.

_The purple dress . The flower phrase ._

The evening went on among celebrations, singing songs by Celine Dion ( by Ted ) and a weeping leafing of a catalog of clothes for newborns ( yes, always Ted ) . They were all a bit tipsy , except for Sarah , who was having regard to her condition of future mother, holding the reins of the situations . Even Robin was quite lucid and she realized that after the encore of My Heart Will Go On, Barney got out in the backyard. Jake was chatting with Marshall and Lily , so she decided to join him . She found him sitting on the stairs , drinking a beer.

" Can I enjoy your company ? " . Robin asked cautiously .  
" You don't even have to ask , you know", Barney replied, smiling at her.  
Robin sat down next to him. "So , what's happening ? If you tell me that _My Heart Will Go On_ moved you and you got here to hide the embarassment, I disown you as a friend ! " , she joked .  
" No, it's not that ... and anyway, I don't cry! I'm a man, a grown- ass man! "  
" "Hey, was it tonight that special about _The Maddest Magicians in the World_, am I right ? "  
" I recorded it ," said Barney , suddenly calm.  
Robin laughed. "So what 's wrong ? "  
" I don't know . Everybody's moving on with their lives while I ... well, I record specials about magicians".  
" But you love magic!"  
" Yes, but I suppose that's not enough, anymore".  
" That's because you haven't met the right person, yet. But it's out there somewhere, I know that ."  
" And how do you know that? "  
" C'mon . Any woman would be happy to be with an awesome, charming, smart man like you. Yes, you are a bit weird , sometimes hugely annoying and childish, but I can ensure that only a fool woman would not want to spend the rest of her life with you".  
" Oh , well ... if you say so, then I have to consider you fool? ", Barney asked, laughing.  
" To be fair , you 've never asked to spend my life with you ", Robin replied, daring him .  
" To be fair , you didn't give me the time. And since you chose Kevin after me , I thought that even if I would ask you, you would say_ no_. And, honestly , I don't know if I could hear another _no_ from you, so ... "

Robin was shocked . She wasn't expecting a confession like that from Barney. She knew she hurt him that night when she chose Kevin, she knew that entering the pub and shaking her head caused him pain but she was equally sure that Barney had no serious intentions with her back then , he only wanted to try to be together again, with no serious intentions. And she was tired of that, she wanted something more. Barney could please her ? He said that he liked her because she was messed up as he was , but nothing else. He didn't tell her that he loved her. And she needed someone to tell her that he loved her . And now, she was there next to Barney , who practically just admitted that he wanted to spend his life with her.

_Why now? Why didn't he tell her before? Does he still thinking that? Timing is a bitch . As always ._

" Hey , sweetie . It's gettin' late . We should go ," Jake said , appearing in the backyard, before Robin could reply to what Barney said .  
" Yeah , it's better go ... " Robin said , standing up, clearly still shocked.  
" Goodnight , Barney , it was nice to meet you ," Jake said. Barney replied with a nod.  
Robin walked toward the entrance when she turned to Barney , who was still sitting on the stairs . She wanted to say something, but not knowing what ._ I'm sorry ? I didn't know about your intentions? Why did you tell me that now?_ In fact there were so many options but she wasn't able to say none of them. She just gave him a quick smile that he returned (though not totally convinced). And that was their goodnight.


	5. Betty&Barney

**AN:** _**Hello, guys! So... here it is Chapter 5! I personally love it because I'm a big fan of sings from universe and all that romantic stuff! I hope you love it, too! Thanks for the reviews, they mean a lot to me so.. keep writing! ;)**_

_**V.**_

* * *

It was Sunday afternoon and Jake and Robin took the opportunity to take a walk in Central Park. Robin didn't sleep well last night - all due to that conversation with Barney on the stairs - and she needed a day of leisure with her fiancé to forget everything.

" I have to say it, I love Central Park. You don't love it ? "  
" Oh, yes, I love it. I would love even more if I had not had to drag you off the carousel for about 3 times! ", Robin said, hugging Jake.  
" Hey, are you okay?" , he asked, noticing that Robin's voice was strangely serious.  
" Yes, why? "  
" I don't know ... you're a bit strange " .  
" No, I'm fine . Really . "  
" You'd tell me if there was something wrong , right?"  
" Of course , you know I always tell you everything."  
"Right . Hey, what about this: I'll take two of those pretzels and then we eat them on this bench. "  
" I'd love that ."  
" Be right back ."  
Robin smiled and sat down on a bench while Jake walked over to the pretzels' stand .

" You should be with Barney, you know that! "

Robin whirled to her left . Who said that phrase ? She had really heard it or she was losing her mind ? Her questions got finally answered when she saw two kids playing with The Flinstones' dolls near her .

" No, Wilma , I love Fred ! " , one of them retorted.  
" No, you love Barney , Betty. Admit it!" , the other girl shouted.

Robin gasped . What was that ? And then, since when the girls staged dialogues like that with their dolls ? She looked away from the scene and looked in front of her . There was something weird about it. Something that made her nervous since she sat down . And finally she understood . That bench , that piece of the park. She was just sitting on the same bench where she found herself in that snowy evening in December when she said goodbye forever to her imaginary children. Hers . And Barney's. Although years had passed since that incident , the memory was still alive. As well as the pain . She had never wanted kids , it's true , but the clear image of how they could have been... well, that still hurt. Two kids who would have for a father the man she had loved for so long. The man she would have not been afraid to have a family with. And now, she was there, again, on the bench . She stared at the engagement ring and tried to imagine her kids with Jake .

" If I can imagine having a family with him , it means that he is the right one ," she thought. A speech perhaps illogical, but she needed some certainties . She closed her eyes to encourage the imagination but nothing appeared.

Meanwhile, one of the two girls, was continuing to scream out loud that name. "Barney , Barney ." That was not helping Robin , still with her eyes closed . "Barney , Barney ! " continued the girl . Suddenly, Robin 's mind finally began to work . Images started to appear in her head, but they weren't the ones she was looking for .

_" I'm pregnant"_  
_" I'm gonna be a daddy ! "_  
_"I can not have a baby? "_  
_" I'm glad you guys arent real ."_  
_" We're engaged ."_

Her breath began to become more difficult.

_" I'm really happy for you ."_  
_" 622 west 14th street ."_  
_" I'm gonna move back to Canada ."_  
_"Hi"_  
_"Hi"_  
_" Look at this , so sexy ! "_  
_"A beautiful flower for a beautiful flower ."_  
_" You didn't give me the time" ._  
_"Barney , Barney ! "_

Robin opened her eyes and exhaled hard , touching her face with a hand. She stared at her engagement ring again and, although now it was fitting her perfectly, she was feeling it tight. As if it didn't belong to her finger. And she felt like that ring again . Tight . In that place, in that situation. She was about to cry but luckily Jake arrived with the two pretzels in his hand.

" Here I aaaam ! " he exclaimed , smiling and handing her the pretzel .  
" Thank you ", Robin replied, taking the pretzel and giving a half -smile to Jake .  
" Hey, what happened? Now don't tell me that everything is fine because i will never buy it ."  
" No.. it's just.. nothing. I'm..um, I'm getting a migraine and those two little girls who do nothing but scream are not helping ! " , she explained , screaming the second part of the sentence.  
" Oh, I didn't know that you suffer from migraines ."  
" It doesn't happen often ."  
" Maybe it's better if we go back home, what do you say? "  
" Yes, I think it's better."

* * *

Barney came home at 6pm , after having spent the day with his father and his family. He loved spending time with his father, he had dreamed of to be finally having lunch with him and tell him about the recent events that had occurred for years. However, this time, he hadn't told him everything, even if he wanted to . In fact, Barney wanted to tell him about Robin's return but he didn't. Perhaps because he found himself way too much vulnerable in the last hours . Yeah, he didn't forgave himself for his decision to admit to Robin that he would have wanted to marry her one day . That she hurt him . Barney couldn't understand why he said those things to her. What he hoped to get from that confession? Robin was engaged , and now she was definitely at home with Mr. Blazer, and the were both laughing at him, that's for sure.

" Dammit , Stinson , enough! ", he admonished himself , and decided to go take a shower to clear his mind .

* * *

" Sweetie , I'm going ," Jake said coming into the bedroom, where Robin was looking at some old pictures.

" Okay, have fun! " Robin said , getting up to give him a kiss .  
" A business dinner on Sunday night with hateful and haughty people. You're right , it sounds like a fantastic evening ! " , Jake joked . Robin smiled at him. " What are you doing? " , he asked , noticing the box of pictures on the bed.  
" Oh , the picture in Ted's home gave me an idea. I would like to hang some of them here in the room. It would be nice, don't you think ? "  
" Yes, it's such a nice idea. And if you want, I can stay here to help! ", Jake implored.  
" No, go! " Robin said with a smile.  
Jake kissed her . " Ok .. so, see you later ."  
" Okay, bye ."

Robin got back on the bed to review the pictures, when she realized that one of them had fallen from the pile . She bent down to pick it up from the floor , and when she saw what pic was , she almost became hysterical . That was the picture during Punchy's wedding taken by Lily. The picture where she and Barney were dancing. " So at least you will realize that I was right about the obvious chemistry between the two of you ," Lily explained when she showed it to her .  
And yes, it was obvious. In that picture they were close to each other, just before Barney's phone ringing . So close that a kiss would be the only possible end to that breathtaking dance. But Nora rewrote the ending of the fairy tale. Robin's breath became labored, as had happened several times in the weird Sunday. What was happening to her? The fate, the Universe or whatever it was, were trying to make her open her eyes?

" I need a drink ," she said aloud , heading for the kitchen and pulling out a bottle of vodka that she began to drink. At some point , not knowing how, Robin found herself sitting on the bedroom floor in the purple dress she wore at Punchy's wedding. Beside her, the trusty bottle of vodka that it was almost empty , while she was holding in her hand that picture of her and Barney. Every time she looked at it, the cold bottle of vodka touched her lips which were gettin' salty because of the tears that had started from a few minutes to scratch her face . That situation was unreal, she could hardly believe what was happening to her . It was too much, and she could no longer withstand such pressure . Staggering, Robin managed to stand up , leaving the picture and the bottle on the floor, deciding that she could no longer stay in that house. Damn, that was the house where she'd lived with her future husband , and she could not stand there crying looking at a picture that showed her with another man. It was inconceivable . She took the phone and some cash, and left.

* * *

Barney had just gotten out of the shower when he heard the phone ringing. He saw that the call was from Robin and he was a bit surprised since their last conversation ended in the midst of utter embarrassment.

"Hello ? ", he said .  
" Hey , babe , it's me . Listen ... I know you're gonna get mad, but I'm drunk . I really am , but maybe the fact that I can still use the phone is a sign that maybe I'm exaggerating and it's not true that I'm so drunk, even though I have been drinking 3 ... 4 ... what comes after 4 ? Anyway , I need you to come pick me up because I'm pretty sure that if I get out of here I could no longer find a way to go home. Who knows, maybe I could find myself in Central Park with two stupid kids laughing at me with their stupid dolls , what do you say? I'm waiting here at... " , Robin turned to the bartender . "Where are we? "  
" McLaren 's! " , the bartender said.  
"Right , McLaren 's! Come on, please. I love you ," and saying that, Robin ended the call .

Barney stared at the phone doubtful. What the hell happened? Babe ? I love you ? And why she was drunk ? Where was Jake ? He decided that it was useless to stand there asking questions to which he couldn't find an answer and so he went to get dressed quickly . Robin needed help and for the love of God , he would help her.

Barney came to McLaren 's and noticed a woman dancing on one of the booths in the pub , while a small crowd around her clapped their hands in time , clearly amused .  
" I couldn't ask for anotheeeeeeeeer ! Groove is in the heaaaaaaaaaaaart ! ", she sang .  
" Oh, dammit , why my phone is dead ? The recording of this song would be great as a ringtone ! " , Barney said while approaching her . " Um , Robin? "  
" What ... what are you doing here ? " , she screamed, almost frightened , seeing Barney.  
"You called me saying to come here to pick you up ! "  
"Wha .. what ? No! I called... the other man ! " Robin said , not remembering the name of her fiancé .  
" No, you called me."  
" No, no! You're a liar who gives wrist flowers to the girls and dance damn good . Oh no ,you're not gonna get me this time, you can forget it . This is not a cartoon, Betty will end up with Fred ! "  
" Wait , I think I missed a step ."  
" Go away from me ! " Robin yelled at him , running out of the pub . Barney followed her . "Oh, damn, if I knew we had to run I would run- suited up! "  
" Don't talk to me, don't look at me , don't follow me ! "  
" Robin , I must follow you when you're drunk , the last time I didn't.. you ended up in Toronto ! "  
" Well, maybe that time would have been better if I hadn't come back ."  
" You don't think that ."  
" Yes I do , go back hom- aaaah ! " Robin 's race abruptly ended due to her downfall caused by the heel of her shoe that got broken. Barney reached her.  
" Are you okay ? "  
" Yes..", she replied, sitting on the sidewalk holding up the broken heel .  
" Come on, I'll help you to get up ."  
" Oh, Barney... you always so nice to me ... even when I don't deserve it ."  
" You deserve it, Robin . Always", Barney stood Robin up , holding her. " Let's take you home, now ."  
" No no no no no no ! I can't go home! ", Robin said in panic.  
" Why not? "  
" Because there is a small problem", she said approaching Barney 's ear . " I don't remember where I live ! ", she whispered, before starting to laugh.  
" Okay ... then what do you wanna do ? "  
" I just wanna stay with you".  
" Well, we can't stay here like two idiots and a broken heel".  
" Uh, I have an idea ! Take me to Central Park, I'll sleep on the bench where our children disappeared forever, so maybe I'll dream about them and they will say that I am a failure ."  
"Our kids ? " Barney asked , confused.  
" Yes, mine and yours. A brunette and a blond .. he was also suited up. Oh, you would have been so proud of him ! "  
" Oh my god , you're so drunk ."  
" No, no , it really happened ! "  
" Yeah , I believe you ."  
" No, it's not true. You think I'm just drunk and crazy , and you know what? I'm gonna behave like that! And now I begin to scream because those fools and drunks don't know what they do, right? AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH ! "  
" Okay, okay , Robin , I'll take you to my place before we get arrested for causing a disturb. Again . "

* * *

Barney opened the door of his apartment, with Robin on his shoulders mumbling something not well defined.

" Here we go . C'mon, I'll take you to bed ."  
" Wohoo , what do you wanna do, Stinson ? Bad things with a drunk chick? It's a low move even for someone like you!"  
" Um , actually I would like to avoid your singing of the whole repertoire of Neil Young again as you did before in the cab. I feared for more than once that the driver would have abandoned the vehicle ".  
" Do you know that I banged Neil Young, once ? "  
" No, that was not Neil . And surely he was not young either ." Barney reached the bedroom and helped Robin to climb off his shoulders.  
" You're so funny , why are you always so funny ? " , she asked , placing herself under the covers.  
" I think it's part of my natural charm ."  
" Yeah , you're really fascinating", she confirmed smiling and stroking Barney's hair. He smiled softly, feeling the gentle touch of her on him.  
" Ok, I 'll let you sleep now", he said.  
Robin grabbed his hand . " Just for the record ... I would not have said _no_". The tone of her voice was suddenly broken and her eyes were getting lucid .  
"_No_ to what? ", Barney asked.  
Robin yawned. " You know ... what we talked about yesterday ," she sighed, mumbling the words and falling asleep . Barney looked at her in amazement. He thought that she had not given weight to his words, she would have laughed at them, indeed . But that wasn't the case. Or maybe yes ? It was hard to say, she was drunk and not very reliable - she was even convinced she called Jake instead of him..  
"Night , Robin ," he whispered , trying not to give too much weight to her words , freeing himself from her grasp (even if he wanted to hold her hand all night ) , before turning off the light and leave the room.

It had been a weird evening , but the next morning would have been definitely weirder.


	6. Break, Broke, Broken

**AN:** _**Hello, guys! Here I am with the sixth chapter. I hope you'll enjoy it and review, I write for you! ;)**_

_**V.**_

* * *

7am. Barney walked to the bathroom. He opened the door and.. surprise! He found Robin sleeping on the floor. Who knows since when she was there. He looked at her for a second and remembered how beautiful she was when she was asleep.

" Good morning ", he said .  
Robin opened her eyes. "What .. aaaaaaah! " , the presence of Barney frightened her .  
" AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH ! ", Barney frightened by the screams of her.  
"What , what are you doing here ? ? ", she continued to scream.  
" Um , I live here! "  
"You live in a bathroom ?"  
" Oh my god , are you still drunk ? "  
" No, I'm not ", Robin finally realized where she was. "Why .. why I'm here ? "  
"You called me last night sayin ' that I should come and pick you up at McLaren 's because you were drunk".  
"What? I called you? " ,she asked confused , trying to stand up.  
"Yeah, and as soon as you saw me you ran away, then you fell and you begged me not to take you home ".  
Robin suddenly began to remember something. Central Park, Betty & Barney , the bench , the photo, the bottle of vodka. And now she was at Barney's. She couldn't afford to stay too in contact with him. " I. .. I have to go ", she ruled , still a little wobbly , emerging from the bathroom.  
" Robin , wait ".  
" No, I have to go , right now! Where are my shoes ? "  
"I wouldn't wear them if I were you ".  
"Don't tell me what to do , okay? Stay away from me ! ", Robin ruled going into the bedroom and putting on her shoes .  
" Listen to me ... "  
" You don't exist ! " , she said , running away . A short race, tho, because she fell to the ground .  
"Your heel is broken ".  
" Aho " .

* * *

"I can fix it ", Barney said, taking the broken shoe in his hand, while Robin sat down in the kitchen.  
" Do you have a guy who fixes heels , too? "  
" No, but I have this superglue which fix everything ", he said, pulling out of the drawer a tube of glue with a label sayin': _PROPERTY OF TED MOSBY_ . " It will take 5 minutes for the glue to take effect. I'll tell you in case you have scheduled another escape in the next few minutes", Barney said , handing her a cup of hot coffee.  
Robin rolled her eyes . " Thanks ", she said , picking up the cup . " Um ... and sorry for... well, everything".  
" Nah , it's nothing . You're not the first woman who calls me while she's drunk ."  
" Anyway ... I promise you it will never happen again" .  
Barney chuckled . " Why are you laughing ? ", she asked, quite offended.  
" 'Cause that is the exact phrase I heard when we got back from Toronto that time, remember? "  
" The only thing I remember about that time is the image of those big guys kicking your ass ! "  
" Canadians are too touchy ".  
" Yeah , it must be that ... "  
They smiled to each other.  
" I love that dress ", Barney said taking a sip of his coffee.  
" You do?", she asked, half-smiling.  
" Yeah, we showed Cleveland how it's done!"  
" Totally!", she smiled. She was genuinely happy to know that he remembered their dance. " I'm surprised you still remember that".  
" I could never forget a night like that. You were beautiful. Well, you still are ."  
" Oh , stop it! You're embarassing me! "  
"I didn't think Robin Scherbatsky would get embarrassed ! "  
" Well, there are many things that you don't know ! ", she joked.

Robin 's cell phone rang. She looked at the screen and noticed that the call came from Jake .  
" Oh, damn, it's Jake ! I totally forgot to call him! "  
" Well , at least now you remember what his name is".

" Jake! Oh my god, I'm so so sorry ! ", she said.  
" Robin , are you okay ? Are you hurt? What the hell happened to you? I went to bed last night and when I woke up you weren't back yet ! Do you have any idea how I felt? Where the hell are you ? "  
" You're right , I'm so, so sorry! But I'm fine , I'm .. to ... um ... " , Robin realized that she couldn't tell Jake she was drunk and that she spent the night at Barney 's . " Um ... " she looked at Barney looking for a tip, but he looked short of ideas . " Um , I am with Marshall and Lily! Yeah, yeah .. they had a huge fight and Lily needed someone to talk to and then I fell asleep on their couch . But it's all okay now. They are reconciled and now I can come back! "  
" Thank goodness . I'm waiting for you. But don't do that again, okay? I almost had an heartache!"  
" I know , I promise that will never happen, I swear!"  
" Okay, bye . I love you ."  
" Bye ."

Robin hung up the phone and noticed that Barney looked at her amused. "Don't look at me like that . I certainly couldn't say that I was drunk and that I spent the night by the only single male friend I have! "  
" Oh, Scherbatsky , I'm not judging. In fact, i'm proud of your progresses in lyin' to your boyfriends . Seriously, respect ". Robin sighed and took the last sip of coffee. "I think the shoe is okay now."  
" Yes, I think it's good," she agreed , taking the shoe. Barney , however, showed no signs of letting the shoe go .  
"Why did you get drunk ? " , he asked, serious .  
" I. .. I do not know . It must be the stress , I guess".  
" It 's just for stress, then ? "  
" Yeah, I think so ". The two looked at each other . How many unspoken words were in those looks , words that couldn't be let the shoe go and Robin wore it. "I should go, now ".  
" Yeah".  
She went to the door. " Barney.. thank you".  
"You needed help ".  
Robin smiled , grateful . " See ya ".

* * *

Jake came out of the bedroom as soon as he heard the door open.  
" Hey ", Robin said , worried about how Jake would react to her night out .  
" Hey ", he replied , half-smiling  
" I'm so sorry for last night , I should've called and I didn't and now I feel terrible! " , she justified.  
" Robin , Robin . Don't worry , it can happen. ... Just do not do that again , please".  
" I promise ," she said , smiling and kissing him.  
" I know. So, Lily and Marshall are okay?"  
" Um , yes .. yes , they are ".  
" Great! Do you want some breakfast? "  
" Nope , I've already had it ".  
" Okay . Oh , hey I've some great news ! "  
" Tell me! "  
" 5 minutes ago I received an e-mail. The church we wanted for our wedding is finally available! "  
" Oh, really? When ? "  
" We can book it for November, 21st ".  
" November..", she repeated , not convinced . In the few times that she had dreamed of her wedding , she had always imagined a shiny ceremony with the sun and the warm air of Spring. Nothing to do with the cold air of a gloomy November.  
" You.. don't like the idea of us gettin ' married in Autumn ? "  
" No, it's like ... I don't know ".  
" Babe, just imagine: us gettin ' married under the snow ! That would be so romantic ! "  
"Romantic , right ... " Robin showed false joy not getting how Jake could be so happy to get married between the ice and the cold. Sure, it would have been in perfect Canada style, but this was not what she wanted . But then , she had found herself so confused about everything in the last days that she began to suspect that maybe she really didn't know what she wanted. Maybe a wedding in Autumn would be perfect . " You know what? Autumn is perfect ! "  
"Awesome! " , Jake kissed her enthusiastically. "I'm gonna call to book it. November , baby ."  
" Yeah , November ," Robin cried, trying to hide a certain nervousness . Now there was the date. There was the church. The wedding was becoming something real.

* * *

Barney was in his office , and between a signature and the other , he found time to navigate on the social networks . He found himself on Facebook and noticed what Jake posted .

_Now it's official . NOVEMBER , 21st. Robin and I will get married !_

Barney felt a punch in the stomach . He had not allowed himself but , after last night , he had begun to hope that maybe Robin was not over him . The signs were all there : she called him drunk, she gave him those looks which he had never been able to resist to . That "I wouldn't have said no." And that purple dress. If Nora wouldn't have called , who knows how that night would have ended.. And this November, she would be married . With another man . Barney closed the webpage and mused . He could not go on like this , he could not continue to hope that Robin would magically come back to him . Why she should do that, then ?

* * *

Robin was happy. She was in one of the few places that made her really calm and relaxed. She had returned to work at World Wide News. Sandy Rivers was happy to have her back with him , especially because the women who had tried to replace her were such failures .

" Oh, Scherbatsky , I knew you couldn't resist too long without me ", Sandy said approaching her desk .  
Robin laughed. "I'm engaged, Sandy", she said, showing off her engagement ring .  
" As if it were the first time that an engaged woman falls at the feet of this big man ! "

_Ah , home sweet home!_

* * *

Robin was leaving the WWN building after a long day at work , when she saw Barney waiting for her at the reception, visibly nervous .  
" Hey", she greeted him.  
" Hey ... um , can we talk for a minute? "  
"Yes , absolutely . What's going on ? "  
" Um , I don't know how to say this so ... I'll just go straight . Robin , I've been thinking a lot today and I realized that this thing between you and me.. it can't work ".  
" What do you mean? "  
" You're getting married ."  
" Yeah, I know ."  
" And an engaged woman shouldn't spend the night over the only single male friend she has ".  
" It happened just once ! "  
" I can't run as fast as I can to go to an another's man woman whenever she calls me drunk begging me to pick her up and make her sleep at my house. I don't think it's the best thing to do . You are engaged and I will not stay in the way between you and Jake because what you have is important. I mean , there's even a wedding date ".  
" Barney, what are you sayin ' ? That we shouldn't be friends, anymore ? "  
" No, I'm sayin ' that we can't be the Barney and Robin we used to be years ago".  
" But ... you're my friend and.. I... I need you in my life ", Robin said trying to hold back the tears .  
" That's the point. You shouldn't need me, anymore", Barney said , avoiding her gaze. Robin looked at him open-mouthed , shaking her head not understanding why Barney was acting that way. " Bye , Robin", he said, leaving.  
" No, Barney Barney .. , wait! ", she screamed in a broken tone.  
" You know , I've always thought you would get married in Spring", he said , turning and smiling at her before leaving the building.  
Robin stood looking at him. " Me too ", she whispered .


	7. Barney&Robin Drama Show

**AN:** **_Hello, everybody! Here I am again with Chapter 7! It's a short one and there aren't Barney/Robin interactions but don't worry because the next chapter will be Barney/Robin-centric, I promise. Let's say that this chapter is the introduction to a very important weekend where a LOT's gonna happen. So, I hope you'll enjoy it and review. (By the way, thanks for your words, they mean a lot to me!)_**

**_V._**

* * *

" Where's the poop, Robin? ", Lily asked coming in McLaren 's where Robin was waiting for her at the usual booth.  
" What are you talking about? " , Robin asked, clearly confused .  
" Oh, you know what I'm talking about. You may not do the sweet little helpless child face because it doesn't work with me!"  
" Lily, I really don't know why you're so pissed ! "  
" Who knows, maybe because I just met Jake at the post office and he asked me if everything was okay between me and Marshall because apparently we had a huge fight that our beloved friend Robin helped to solve! "  
Robin knew she was in trouble. " Um ... you're welcome .. ? ", she said, trying to defuse the situation .  
" Robin where the hell did you go that night ? And you why you're acting so weird ? Between you and Barney I don't know who deserves the award for best weird person of the year but ... WAIT A MINUTE ! ", Lily seemed to have understood what there was under the weird behavior of her friends. " Something happened between you and Barney, right? "  
Robin sighed, closing her eyes. In fact she didn't even know if something really happened between her and Barney. Sure, she was drunk and called him instead of Jake, but that does not mean anything. At least she thought so, before Barney's speech at WWN. It had been two days now since that moment. Two days in which they had avoided each other, except for Wednesday evening , where they all met in McLaren 's. "I should go , tonight opens a new strip- club and I have to check if it is worthy of my awesomeness ", Barney said, when he saw Robin and Jake entering the pub.  
" Robin ... ? ", Lily asked , bringing Robin back to reality.  
" Huh , yeah ? "  
" So, something happened between you and Barney? "  
" No. I mean ... nothing relavant, anyway ".  
" Explain ". Lily knew that there was something more.  
" I got drunk and I called him. Then he took me to his place and he let me sleep there. I thought it was nothing serious until he decided that we can't no longer see each other as before and that we need a break. So stupid " .  
"It's not stupid ", Lily ruled, annoyed . Robin looked at her questioningly . " Robin , you can't, _you can't_ get drunk and call Barney. Do you understand that now you're engaged and you have to take some responsibility? "  
" I know , but what's the big deal ? It happened once and it will never happen again. Barney overreacted ! "  
" You called him . Among all the people that you could call , you called _him_. This means something, it must mean something ! "  
" I was drunk and I didn't know what I was doing , that's what it means ! "  
Lily noticed a dress in a transparent casing next to Robin. " What's that ? ", she asked .  
" Oh , I went to pick it up at the laundry ", Robin explained .  
" Is that the dress you wore at Punchy's wedding ? "  
Robin knew that Lily was still investigating . " Yeah ", she answered .  
" And ... did you wear it recently ? "  
" Maybe"  
" Robin ... "  
Robin sighed. She knew that Lily would not have released the grip . "Okay . I wore it on Sunday night , are you happy ? "  
" So .. you wore that dress and then you got drunk and called Barney ." Robin looked down. "Can I ask you something ? "  
Robin looked up . " Yeah".  
"The fact that Barney is single and not married as you thought .. is disturbing you? "  
There it was. The question that Robin was hoping no one would want ask. The question that she had tried in every way to not ask herself since her return in the Big Apple because the answer was obvious. And it hurt. She hadn't any idea why it hurt so much since she moved on. Oh, c'mon, who was she kidding? She hadn't move on, she turned the corner just to find herself at the same point as before.  
" Well, surely I was shocked when I found out that he and Quinn broke up but .. that's it ", Robin said, trying to show the most sincere smile that she could. Lily knew her too well and knew that she was trying to hide her true feelings.  
" I really hope you're not lying because if you are , you've got a big problem to face. Especially 'cause we're going to Farhampton on Saturday for Sarah 's birthday and you guys better behave like two normal friends , and not as the protagonist of the "Barney & Robin Drama Show", Lily replied.  
Robin nodded. "Don't worry".  
"Okay".  
" Anyway.. what did you answer to Jake?"  
Lily smiled. " That you're a good friend and that we're lucky to have someone like you who can help us when we are in need".  
" Thanks", Robin whispered smiling at her friend.

* * *

" What it means that you're not coming ? " , asked Ted on the phone with Barney.  
" It means that I have no desire in spending an entire weekend sorrounded by couples and all those fuss you call _people in love's behavior_. I have a dignity, Ted ".  
" But it's Sarah's birthday! You like her! "  
" I like porn too but I don't go to every pornstar 's birthday . Actually, that would be fun .. "  
" Dude ! You will be at Farhampton with us, end of discussion ".  
" But ..."  
" No but! I don't know why are you acting so weird but whatever is the reason , it 's not sufficient to avoid the birthday of the person I love the most in the world , okay? "  
" Yeah , we both know that I'm the person you love the most " .  
" No, you're not ".  
" C'mon , best friends are the most important people - "  
" Actually Marshall is my best -"  
" Ted ! Can you just be cool for once ? "  
" Okay , so .. will you go with Lily , Marshall and Robin or with Sarah and me ? " Ted asked , changing the subject .  
" Wait , what about Jake ? "  
" Jake can't be present, Robin told me that he has an important job meeting, so .. "  
" Oh ."  
Barney became nervous. A weekend with Robin. In a romantic place. Nothing good would have come out from that.

But if he really thought that, why he was smiling, now?


	8. I Love You

**AN: ****_Hello, guys! I'm back with Chapter 8. So, things between Barney and Robin ( and Jake and Robin) will begin to change in this chapter. Until now, I tried to take the characters to the point where they have to deal with their true feelings. You can't run away from what you really want. Am I right? _**

_**V.**_

* * *

It was 11am and Marshall , Lily and Robin arrived at the Inn Farhampton first. They had to wait an hour before Ted , Sarah and Barney showed up at the hotel door .

" Finally! But how long did you take ? ", Lily asked , getting up from a chair that was in the lobby.  
" All thanks go out to Mr. and Mrs. Let's- lose - time - to - look - useless - things - that -we- call - awesome ," Barney said, exasperated .  
" How tragic are you , we have made only a small detour! ", Ted justified .  
" A little detour ? Ted , I thought that your baby would be born in that car ! "  
" Oh c'mon , stop fighting ! This is my weekend and all we have to talk about is me and the awesome gifts I'll receive ! ," Sarah said. Hearing those words , Robin winced.  
"Right ," Ted cried, kissing his sweetheart on her forehead. The pair went upstairs to rest their suitcases while Marshall and Lily went out for a walk in the surrounding area .  
" Oh my god ," Robin whispered.  
"Great , all the couples are leaving and we're alone like two idiots ," Barney said , turning to Robin which was arguing at the reception counter .  
" OH MY GOD! ", She repeated , louder .  
" I know , it's terrible! Plus there are not single chicks in here!"  
" No, I was not talking about that ! "  
"What were you talking about, then ? "  
" I haven't bought a gift for Sarah ! Can you believe it ? We're here for her birthday and I haven't bought a gift , I'm the worst friend ever ! " Robin rubbed a hand on her forehead . How could she forget such a thing ? The latest events happened in the past week definitely had their faults.  
" Ok , Scherbatsky . Calm down because , once again , Barney Stinson's gonna rescue you , since I have already bought the gift for Sarah because _I_ am a true friend .. " , Robin rolled her eyes hearing those words, but she let him continue to talk , " we can say that we bought it together."  
" Really ? Thank you, Barney ! You're saving my life! "  
" Naaah , it's nothing".  
" So , what did you buy ? "  
" Well , since she has yhat stupid obsession for coins , I bought two passes for her and Ted to the Coin- Com" .  
Robin grimaced. "Coin -Com ? Is that a thing ? Really ? "  
" Apparently . The guy who sold me the tickets tried to explain what it is but I didn't hear him because the sound of my laughter covered his voice".  
Robin laughed . She had missed Barney these days, hearing his voice , listening his strange adventures . Barney smiled when he realized she was amused. Nothing made him happier than her smile knowing that he was the one who procured it to her .  
" Hey , guys, it's lunch time, c'mon! ", Sarah cried , coming downstairs.  
" Okay!" Robin said . "Hey, Barney, what shall I give you ? For the gift ... "  
Barney smiled . " A true gentleman never let a lady pay" .  
Robin smiled and followed him into the dining room .

* * *

The rest of the day passed quickly . After lunch, the gang went out for a walk on the beach and they all clamoring Robin to sing _Sandcastles in the Sand_ . Of course, she didn't. But Sarah saved the situation , singing beautifully the words of_ All This Time_ by One Republic:

_All this time_

_We were waiting for each other_

_All this time_  
_I was waiting for you_

_We got all these words_  
_Can't waste them on another_  
_So I'm straight in a straight line_  
_Running back to you_

Barney and Robin looked at each other . That song seemed to speak for them and how despite everything, no matter what , they ended up back to the other. But that wasn't the only reason why their eyes crossed . That song was the one they danced together at McLaren's when they were a couple, when they pretended to be a happy couple in front of Ted . What a mess that they had been together, but also how much love they had shared in that short time . And that moment of their dancing to the tune of that song, it was definitely one of those moments of love that they were happy to have shared together. The problem now it was that they were not together. Barney was back to his old life and Robin had an engagement ring on her finger. There was no more space for the memories, for love, for those looks. And the realization of that pushed them to look away from the other.

* * *

" So , let me understand .. you celebrate the anniversary of your first _I Love You_ ? " , Sarah asked, turned to Marshall and Lily , while they were having dinner.  
" Yes! " , Marshall said proudly , smiling at Lily and kissing her .  
" Oh , that's so sweet! We should do the same ," Sarah cried, turning to Ted .  
" Thank you, Marshall ", Ted said , visibly upset .  
"Wait . Ted - Date -Me -And- I'll- Tell- I-Love -You doesn't want to celebrate a special occasion like that? " Robin asked , surprised .  
Sarah smiled. " It's not that , it 's just that we celebrate so many things already. The day we met , the day we first kissed , the day I said that my favorite movie is Star Wars ... "  
" That's my favorite celebration ," Ted cried, amidst the laughter of the others.  
Robin 's phone rang. It was Jake . "Sorry , I'll be right back ! "

Robin went in the lobby and answered. "Hello ? "  
" Hi , baby. How are you? "  
" Fine . This place is wonderful ... I wish you could be here" , she said. _What a liar_ , she thought . She hadn't thought of Jake all day .  
" Me too . I know it might sound cheesy , but I miss you ".  
" I miss you too ". _What a liar , part 2_ . " But don't worry, that is not cheesy and I can assure you, because I just heard one of the cheesiest thing ever ! "  
"Really ? Tell me ! "  
" Marshall and Lily celebrate the anniversary of the first time they said _I Love You_ . Can you believe it ? What a stupid recurrence is that? " , she said , giggling .

Silence . Jake didn't answer.

" Jake ? Are you still there ? "  
" Um , yeah . I 'm .. I just .. "  
" What? What's wrong ? "  
" I just don't think it's a cheesy recurrence. Indeed , I find it very sweet. But then again, where's the problem? That recurrence will never be a problem for us ".  
"What do you mean? "  
" I don't know if you've ever noticed it but you 've never said _I Love You_ to me ".  
Robin froze . She knew that sooner or later that conversation needed to be faced, but not in that way. And definitely not over the phone . "We have to talk about it now? "  
" When do you wanna talk about it ? When we are in the church to exchange wedding vows and your answer to my_ I Love You_ will be a smile and nothing else? "  
" Jake , you know that it is not easy for me to externalize my feelings . I'm not one who likes to say those words 24 hours a day! "  
" It would be enough for you to tell me that at least once. Only once, Robin ! Is that really so much to ask? "  
"Why is it so important, for you ? You know how much I care about you ... I said yes when you proposed ! That should be enough , don't you think ? "  
" Not anymore ".  
" Jake ... "  
"Listen ... maybe we should talk about that when you're home ".  
" Yeah , I think the same" .  
" Okay .. so .. See you tomorrow ."  
"Yes , see you tomorrow ."  
Robin hung up and walked toward the bedroom. She rinsed her face and looked in the mirror. Why she couldn't say those three words ? She wanted to tell him , she really wanted to. There was something which was blocking her and she had no idea what it was. The idea that maybe she didn't love him still pounding in her head but it couldn't be that. She had agreed to marry him . She was wearing an engagement ring on her finger. She was living with that man. Robin knew that all those things would not have happened if she didn't care about him. Yes, care. Love, perhaps , was another thing.

" Robin? Are you in there? I came upstairs to take the gift for Sarah and - " Barney noticed that the bedroom door was open but he stopped at the door , noticing that Robin was sitting on the bed with the head in her hands .  
"What happened? " , he asked , concerned .  
" Jake and I had a fight ", she replied, looking at him.  
" Did you finally tell him that his taste in clothing is comparable to that of a drunk gretzly ? "  
"No".  
" Oh. Well, you should tell him, anyway."  
" That's if he still wants to talk to me, who knows ."  
" Why you're saying that? "  
" This doesn't go against our agreement not to confide too intimate thing to each other? "  
" Maybe , but I can't stand here and see you so sad . Sorry, but I will not let you being like this on a weekend where you should joke about the fuss of those couples downstairs". Robin smiled. Barney came into the room and placed the gift for Sarah on the nightstand, then he sat next to Robin. " So , what happened? "  
" We were talking about the anniversary of the first _I Love You _of Lily and Marshall - "  
" Lameversary "  
"Totally ! Thank you! " Robin was relieved that Barney understood her. Damn , he always understood her. " Anyway , that gave him the impetus to wonder why I've never said_ I love you _to him ".  
" Never ? "  
" Never. And I know it's weird because we've been together for a while and we're getting married .. but I can't tell him those three damn words. I would , I swear. But they just don't wanna come out of my mouth and I can't understand why! "  
" Well , you've got a big problem, Scherbatsky ".  
" Thanks for telling me what I already know , you're a great help to me" , she sighed . " Aaah , damn it. It should not be that difficult. People always say that in TV shows! "  
" Yeah , but they're actors and ... WAIT A MINUTE ! I just had a great idea ! "  
" Translated : it will be the worst idea ever".  
" You need to do some practice."  
" Practice ? "  
" Yeah. You're uncapable to say it, then all that you need to do is practice saying it again and again and again so that when you're in front of Jake , the words will easily come out! "  
" You know , I think I just reached the lowest point of my life because it seems a brilliant idea ! "  
" I told you . C'mon , I'll help you ".  
"How can you help me?"  
Barney looked around and picked up Robin's blazer which was on the chair and put it on. "Hello , I'm Jake and I wear blazers with curious proud" .  
Robin laughed. " What's that ? "  
" Um , the man you decided to marry! "  
" Oh, I don't think so ! "  
" C'mon , tell me that you love me ," he said , taking a black scarf and putting it over his head. " Now I even have his own hairstyle ".  
Robin giggled . " But it's ridiculous , how can I say such a thing to my ex -boyfriend dressed up as what is supposed to be my fiancè ? This is an absurd situation , David Lynch would make a movie out of this story! "  
" Robin , do you wanna say those three words looking adorably at him or not? "  
" Ok , let's do that. Um, do you mind saying that you love me first? I think it would be easier ."  
Barney began to speak in a voice much deeper than his to mimic Jake's. " Oh , okay . Hi RoRo , I'm Jake and .. I know I'm not as awesome as Barney but - "  
"He would never say that! "  
" Robin , just ... okay? "  
" Fine . Go ahead ."  
" So .. I was saying that even though I'm not as awesome as Barney , I love you ."  
Robin laughed. " I'm sorry , but I can't say something romantic to someone dressed like that! Take off that stuff ," she said with amusement. Barney ordered . " This is so unprofessional ! ", he said , annoyed .  
" Yeah , I never liked rules. C'mon , start over ".  
" Can I ? Or I have to remove my suit, too?" , he blinked .  
Robin rolled her eyes . " .. Just start over! "  
"Ok". Barney breathed and looked her straight in the eyes . " Robin , I love you ."  
As soon as she heard those words , Robin's heart beat wildly. Barney didn't use Jake's fake voice this time. He was just himself. They were sitting on the bed, their eyes fixed on the other , and Barney just said he loved her without half-amused smiles on his face . He was there , beside her, waiting for a reaction from her.  
" I. .. " , Robin tried to think of Barney as Jake but that proved to be a futile attempt . He was Barney , not Jake . "I love you, too ," she said, whispering.  
"You do ? " , Barney asked. He was pretty sure that Robin said those words to him and not to the character he was playing, just like he said he loved her few seconds earlier. He knew it, he knew it . But he wanted to go deeper into the matter.

"Of course I do . I haven't loved anyone as much as I love you. I can't love anyone as much as I love you ", Robin's voice broke. That was so not a play.

" Why did you wait so long to tell me? "  
"Because I was scared . I'ts not easy to admit to love someone so much that just the idea of losing him makes you suffer. That is why I've made the wrong choices and that is why I didn't want to be happy because I was afraid that sooner or later what I had with you would have ended. It takes courage to be happy and I 've never had it. "  
" It's never too late to decide to be happy. I 'd do anything to make you happy ."  
Robin grabbed Barney's right hand . " I know you would ," she said then.

The situation was going out of control. By now it was clear that the scene wasn't acted but it was pure and simple truth. They were not Fake Jake and Robin , they were Barney and Robin . And they knew it. Who they wanted to fool? Barney stroked gently with his thumb the little finger of Robin's hand that was on his own. Damn , it felt so right .Barney felt that Robin was tense but so was he. His heart was beating like a crazy drum. He had tried to stay away from her for the good of both. But it was more difficult than expected. He could not resist her. He simply couldn't. His eyes were fixed on Robin's and hers were fixed on Barney's . Blue, shiny, beautiful . If Jake's eyes hypnotized her, Barney's eyes made her want to kiss him. The room was silent , except for the breaths that were becoming more frantic by both because they knew what would happen next . In a few minutes they would forget about engagement rings , friendship's deals , rules, everything. They would forget about the rest of the world and they would have made that bed on which were seated, another use .  
Their faces approached each other while their eyes were fixed on the mouths of the other. They wanted each other so badly , they had never ceased to desire the other. And if time and distance din't change this, maybe it meant something .  
Their lips were close to touch. Nothing could stop them, nothing could make them decide to stop.

" Robin , are you here ? Have you seen Barn - " , Lily walked into the room and Barney and Robin had the reflexes to get away from each other and getting up from the bed. But Lily saw them . " Oh, I'm .. I'm sorry, I did not know you were .. I mean , the door was open and ..."  
" No, no, no, it's not a problem . Barney was helping me to .. "  
" Saying _I Love You_ to Jake ".  
" Exactly ! We were doing some practice".  
" Practice ," Lily repeated . " A real intense practice," she added allusive .  
"So , what 's the matter ? " , Barney asked trying to change the subject as soon as possible .  
" The others are waiting for us down for the toast ", Lily said.  
" Ok , great .. let's go! " Barney said, picking up the gift for Sarah and getting out of the room to avoid other detectives looks by Lily.  
Robin looked at Lily who was shaking her head. " What?"  
" I told you , no Barney & Robin Drama Show this weekend!"  
" In fact, there was no drama ".  
" Oh, right . Because what was about to happen was more of a Barney & Robin Dirty Show!"  
" Can you just stop with those shows, Already ? "  
" Robin, I saw you! You were one step away from jump on this bed while in New York in another bed there's your fiancé who can't wait to see you again! What were you thinking ?! "  
Robin knew that Lily was right. " I. . I guess I was not thinking at all ," she said guiltily , rubbing a hand over her forehead . She still had not forgiven her for cheating on Kevin and she had sworn to herself that it would not have happened again. But Barney could mess up all her promises . Barney was Barney. No one looked at her like him, no one made her feel so desired like him. No one . But now she was with Jake , she had an engagement ring on her finger, and had responsibilities. Jake was loving , funny, sweet . He helped her to start a new life in Canada. She had learned to smile again thanks to him . Jake was perfect. But was about to happen with Barney was a big deal.  
" C'mon , let's go ," Lily said, patting the back of Robin and together they went downstairs from others.

" Oh, you're finally here ", Ted said, already with a glass of champagne in hand while Lily and Robin took a seat, taking also the glasses in their hand. " I want to dedicate this toast to the woman who born exactly 32 years ago . I wanna thank the parents of this splendor they created in order to give meaning to my life. I can't even imagine what my life would have been if you had never been born , or if I had never met you. Today is your birthday but you gave me the greatest gift of all by loving me. I love you , Sarah. Happy birthday . "  
They made all cin -cin and Sarah , visibly moved , kissed Ted whispering "I love you, too . So much!"

_That is love_ , Robin thought, noticing how easily Ted and Sarah declared their love. When you love , it's simple . She turned to Barney , who stared back at her for a millisecond before returning to talk to Marshall.


	9. Reasons

**AN: ****_So, here we go with Chapter 9. The turning point. Things are gonna change forever after this chapter (it was about time!) Anyway, I hope you enjoy this chapter and, as always, reviews are appreciated!_**

**_V._**

* * *

After dinner, the gang went to a party on the beach. Ted and Marshall were already quite tipsy and were making their friends laugh with them singing 500 Miles.  
"I swear I've never seen Ted that drunk before!" , Sarah said between laughs.  
"Oh well, because you weren't there that time he called Marshall and me after we moved to Long Island", Lily said.  
"Yeah, he turned around a lapdance pole saying he was a stripper!" , Robin added.  
"Aw, I should have known you years ago!" , said Sarah disappointed. Lily hugged her while Robin rubbed her back. She liked Sarah - even though they barely knew each other, she understood what a wonderful person she was. It was not a coincidence that she had found a soulmate in Ted. They were pretty much the same person.  
"Hey, where's Barney?" , Lily asked, looking around and noticing the absence of her friend.

"YOU JERK!" , a young girl exclaimed, running away from the beach and passing by the girls.  
"I think I found him", Robin said, realizing that the jerk in question was probably Barney. She walked toward the shore and in fact she found Barney. She gulped when she saw that he had his sleeves rolled up. It was something that drove her crazy - the erotic charge that Barney sent with that look hit her every single time.  
"So, um.. what are you doing?" , she asked.  
"Well, unfortunately nothing, yet" , he replied annoyed.  
"Are you trying to get laid, tonight?" , she asked, slightly irritated. Damn, they almost jumped on each other in her bedroom and now he had already forgotten everything and he was ready for the next chick?  
"Um, yes?" , he replied, as if it were a matter of course. "Why are you so surprised?"  
"Because of what almost happened earlier. And we don't .. I mean .. um ... I thought we'd talk."  
"We are talking, already", Barney said, pretending not to know what she was talking about.  
"Barney, c'mon .."  
Barney looked down. "Why should we, anyway?" , he asked, looking up and watching Robin straight in the eye. His gaze froze her. "Yes, if Lily had not come in we would probably now clinging on each other in that room. But we both know how it would end, then: we would wake up the next day realizing that we had made a mistake. Oh, no. Sorry. _You_ would wake up the next day and realizing_ you_ made a mistake, then _yo_u'd say that we are wrong and _you_'d be back to Jake trying to forget what had happened while I, for the millionth time, I would have found myself asking what I did do wrong ".  
"It would have been a mistake because I am engaged, Barney, not because you would do something wrong or..-"  
Barney stopped her. "Robin, Robin. It's fine. Really. I'm done trying to keep hoping that one day you'll finally take the courage to get back with me. I can't do that anymore. I will never be worth the risk, I got it".  
"You're not what? Barney, that's not true, you know that!" , she cried.  
"Look, when I said that we had to take a break from our friendship, it was precisely to avoid such situations occur. Let's just forget what happened in that bedroom".  
"So I also have to forget what you said back then, the fact that you loved me and all that stuff..? "  
"It was just a play".  
Robin couldn't believe those words. "No, I don't believe you", she said, firmly. She knew Barney, she knew when he lied and when he was serious. And back in that room, he was serious.  
"Well, you should", he replied, serious.

"Guyssssss! Hey, what are you doing here? Ted is dancing the Macarena, let's go!" , said Marshall, coming up and grabbing the arms of his friends to bringing them back to the rest of the group. Barney and Robin shared a quick glance which marked the end of the discussion.

* * *

It was not an easy night for Barney and Robin. The gang partied until late and, even though the two had succeeded in avoiding the other for the rest of the evening, when they found themselves in their rooms at 3am, they had to come to terms with their thoughts. Barney continued to call himself a fool, because he had tried to do the right thing letting Robin go but in the end he found himself in her bedroom, telling he loved her. And, despite what he had said to her on the beach, he actually loved her. She was the main reason why he could never marry Quinn, why he couldn't marry any woman. And getting back there, on the bed next to her, holding her hand, with her eyes fixed on him, it was something he had dreamed of so many times in those two years. He wanted her so badly. But now he was on his bed, still dressed, thinking that she would end up hurting him again. He wasn't the safe choice, he wasn't a perfect husband material like Jake. No, he was Barney. The playboy, the child, the non-reliable one. But he was also caring, smart and sweet and he used to think that Robin knew that side of him but when two years ago, during that night Robin chose Kevin over him, he began to suspect that she would never take him for someone who she could build a future with. And damn, if she was wrong. They would be happy, together. He was sure about that. And maybe Robin knew that, too. After all she said she loved him, she said she knew he would do anything to make her happy. Barney got out of bed and walked out of his room and walked towards Robin's room and stood at her door. He wasn't sure what he wanted to do, he didn't know what would have happened if he had knocked on the door and Robin had opened it. The only thing he knew is that he had to do something.

On the other hand, Robin was trying in vain to find the right position to fall asleep. Any attempt proved futile because since she was lying on the bed, she had been thinking about Barney's breath on her. And how she felt in that moment. God, she could not remember when was the last time she had felt that way. But then, she began to think about all those words that he had said, about how he would never be enough for her .. why on earth would he think that? Robin felt guilty because the last thing she wanted was make Barney feeling like he was not worth enough, because the truth was that he was worth. He was it. Too much. And she was engaged. Robin looked at her engagement ring and sighed. It had never been so tight before.

"_All this time we were waiting for each other_ ..." , Robin hummed softly, glancing toward the door. She didn't know what she wanted. If the brain was telling her she had to try to close her eyes and fall asleep, the heart was living with the hope that Barney would have knocked on the door shortly thereafter. He told her he loved her, Robin knew that those words were sincere and were not part of the play that they had put in place a few hours before. Or so she wanted to believe.

"Please, please, knock at that damn door," Robin whispered, staring at the door.

Barney, on the other side of the door, raised his hand to knock, but he stopped before his knuckle could touch the door. Barney sighed and looked up at the ceiling. What the hell was he doing? He told Robin he had decided to give up on her. And she didn't care. She just let him go. So, why was he there? He went back to his room, but as soon as he opened the door, he changed his plans and went back to Robin's bedroom door. Now he was there again, like an idiot, not knowing whether to knock or not. Meanwhile, on the other side of the door, Robin got up from the bed, determined to go to Barney to tell him that he was worth it. That she was just confused and needed time to think about them. So now she was there, in front of the door that she hoped Barney would knock sooner or later, and reached out to grab the handle. Barney, on the other hand, was ready to knock. They didn't know, but there was only one door dividend them. However, neither of them had the courage to do something. Both knew that going to the other would have been a mistake and so they retraced their respective beds. For that night, they would not stand up again.

* * *

The next morning, the gang found themselves to breakfast which was quite short and silent, primarily due to the terrible hangovers Marshall and Ted but also because Barney and Robin had avoided looking at each other the entire time and Lily couldn't help but shake her head. She knew that it would end like this.

* * *

The group returned to NYC just before lunch. Robin found herself at the door of Jake's apartment, trying to find the courage to open it and deal with Jake. It has been a difficult and stressful weekend for many reasons. And in that moment, another fight was the last thing she needed but she knew that she couldn't avoid it. And she also knew that Jake was in need of explanation. In all that mess, Jake was the only innocent. It was thus that she finally opened the door and found Jake on the couch.  
"Hi", Jake said, standing up.  
"Hi", she replied nervously.  
"How was your weekend?", he asked.  
"Good", the image of her on the bed with Barney appeared in her head. "And yours?"  
"Good". The two stared at each other in silence when Jake finally resumed word. "So, you're hungry? I can prepare you something -"  
"No, I'm good, thanks".  
"Okay. So.. do you wanna talk?"  
"Yes, let's talk".  
"Where do we start?"  
"I don't know, maybe from the fact that you cried on the phone for no reason!"  
"No reason? Robin, after 2 years I would expect something more than a simple I care about you! I know that you don't like talking about your feels, but it's getting too far! You don't say anything to me, you never talk about what you have in mind and since when we got back here, the situation just got worse! "  
"What do you mean?"  
"Robin... we have had sex just once since we are here!"  
"Only once? No, that's impossible! The last time was ...", Robin finally realized that Jake was right. The fact that she was not even needing intimacy with him, it was a clear warning signal. "Oh, crap".  
"So, what is happening to you?"  
"Nothing".  
"Here we go, again. I ask you to open yourself emotionally, but you just close yourself even more. I knew you'd react like that, so ...", Jake went into the bedroom and returned with a picture in his hand. "Can you explain this?"  
Robin took the picture and froze. "It's a picture of me and Barney dancing".  
"Yes, but it's also the picture I found on the floor on Monday morning next to an empty bottle of vodka. And what a coincidence, you came home wearing the purple dress of the picture. The same dress you threw away with such anger when I pulled it out, saying you didn't like it. I, I didn't want to give it too much weight but it's clear that there is something underneath ". Robin began to remember something about that night, about how she had found drunk on the floor. Drunk and broken. The hands that were clutching the picture began to tremble. Nothing had changed since that picture was taken. She wanted Barney in the same manner in which she wanted him in that picture. "What's going on, Robin? It seems that you always think of something else, you don't look at me like before, you're distracted and sad. At first I thought you were still thinking about the guy you ran away from two years ago but then I saw this picture and - "  
Robin couldn't stand it more and finally confessed the truth. "You're right", she finally said with a sigh. "I was, I am still thinking about that guy". The final part of the sentence was spoken in a broken tone of voice. It wasn't an easy thing to say at all, indeed. She felt terribly guilty for saying that phrase, for confessing to the man who wanted to marry her, that there was someone else in her heart.  
Jake was silent for a few seconds. "So .." , he cleared his throat, "Barney has nothing to do with that?"  
Robin had never told Jake who that mysterious guy was. She didn't know why she had done so, and now, after confessing that she was still thinking about another one, she also would have to confess the true identity of that man. She rubbed her forehead and took a deep breath before speaking. "Um ... the truth is ...", god, it was so hard to say.. "The truth is .. B-Barney is_ that_ guy".  
"What?" Jake asked, shocked, looking at Robin as if she had said she would be leaving for an expedition on the moon. Robin looked down, then lift it up, noticing that Jake was shaking his head. "Oh my God, of course it's him. The fact that he broke up with his fiancée and that you have changed your attitude and all those things that happened.. the dress ... damn, I'm such an idiot".  
"No, you're not! You couldn't know it!"  
"Why didn't you tell me that it was him?"  
"I don't know. I thought that If I wouldn't talk about it, that would help to move forward but only now I realize that it does not work like that".  
"So, he's the reason you've never said that you love me. You love someone else, I'm just your consolation prize".  
"No, Jake, you have to believe me! I have always been sincere when I said I wanted a future with you!"  
Jake folded his arms. "So, since you're sincere, answer this question: if you had found out that Barney was back single before I asked you to marry me, you would have said yes, anyway?"  
Robin's heart skipped a beat. That question hit her like a punch in the stomach. If she had known that Barney wasn't married, most likely she would be back in New York a long time ago. It was amazing how, until a few weeks ago, she was convinced that she had finally found peace and stability with Jake, that nothing and nobody could change it. But now, here she was. In front of her fiancé, admitting to him and herself a truth that hurt too much. She said nothing, just looked sadly at Jake.  
Jake chuckled. "We can't get married like this".  
"I know".  
"So, what is gonna happen?"  
"I. .. I don't know. I don't wanna break up with you but I guess I need some time alone. .. To clear my mind".  
Jake was relieved to know that Robin did not want to leave him. He was so in love with her and he didn't want to lose her. Now she had asked for time to think and the only thing he could do was give it to her. "Okay. How much time do you need?"  
"I have no idea .. some days".  
"What about this? Let's see each other a week from now and then we take stock of the situation."  
"Yeah, it is a good idea".  
"Okay".  
"Okay .. um, I'm gonna grab some clothes and then I go".  
"I can pay you the hotel".  
"Oh, no. No. I... I don't deserve it," she said candidly before heading for the bedroom.

Robin walked out of the room with a small trolley in tow.  
"So, I'll see you on Sunday", he said, accompanying her to the door.  
"Yes, Sunday", she said before taking off the engagement ring from her finger and giving it to Jake. "It's not right for me to wear it.. at least for the moment", she said.  
Jake nodded, running his fingers over that piece of jewelry. "I hope to put it back on your finger again", he said, giving her a sadly smile that she returned.  
"I hope it, too."  
"Bye, Robin."  
"Bye, Jake."


	10. How Sarah Met Barney

**AN: ****_Chapter 10 is here, everybody! So, someone is returning in this chapter but there's a reason for that, I promise. You'll see!_**

_**V.**_

* * *

" Thanks again for giving me hospitality" , Robin said eating the last piece of meat on the plate.  
" You don't have to thank us , we do it with pleasure, you know", Ted replied , smiling at her sweetly . "I hope that everything between you and Jake will get solved ".  
" So do I ", Robin replied, not believing her own words. In fact, she didn't know what she was really hoping . On one hand she just wanted to go home, back to her normal life, wear that engagement ring and fall asleep next to Jake . That was her life up to that point , it had become her daily routine and she was happy to live that way. On the other hand, there was Barney. And there were no words to describe what that man had and continued to cause to her soul and her heart.  
" Do you want coffee , Robin? " , Sarah asked, appearing from the kitchen.  
" No, thank you , Sarah. I think I'm gonna go get some rest. It has been a rather eventful weekend ", she said, rising from the chair .  
Sarah nodded. " Wait, I get you a blanket ," she said to her, following her into the guest room. She opened the closet and pulled out the blanket , spreading it on the bed with Robin's help.  
" Thanks ", Robin smiled gratefully .  
" If you need anything , don't hesitate to ask."  
"Okay ", she replied , smiling at her . God, Sarah was so kind with her and Robin felt even more guilty for not having bought a birthday gift to her.  
" Look, are you really that tired ? 'Cause Lily and I are gonna do some shopping in about an hour , will you come with us? I need to buy something fantastic to wear for the Coin- Con! "  
" Thanks, but I think I'm gonna take a nap ," Robin said softly. "So, are you and Ted excited for the Coin -Con, huh?"  
" Yes! We 've never gone there before , it's a dream coming true! Thanks again to you and Barney ".  
Robin gasped hearing the word _Barney_ and she let out a nervous smile that didn't go unnoticed to Sarah's eye. "Something 's wrong ? ", she asked .  
" No, no . Everything's good ", Robin replied .  
" Okaaay .. Because I can swear I saw you pretty nervous when I said ... "  
" Oh, time flies ! Hurry up before the shops close ! " , Robin said , escorting Sarah to the door. She didn't want to talk about Barney. At least, not for the moment. She needed more time.  
" Yeah , okay ..." , Sarah said , realizing that Robin didn't want to continue the conversation. But before leaving, she turned to Robin, who meanwhile was sitting on the bed, and looked at her questioning. " I'm sorry , I know we don't know each other so much and they're not my business at all but I can't resist to ask you: what's going on with you and Barney ? ", she finally asked .  
Robin looked at her in alarm. The fact that Sarah had realized that something was wrong between her and Barney made her realize that she was unable to hide her feelings for him. And that scared her because damn, Robin Scherbatsky had been the Queen of Not - Show -Your -Emotions , but when it was about Barney, her kingdom was invaded by her feelings that she couldn't control .  
" Nothing's wrong with him ", Robin said with a broken voice , looking down. Heck, she was really the worst liar ever.  
" With him , you mean _Barney_ ? " , Sarah asked, emphasizing Barney's name to see if Robin would react . In fact, she winced again . " Barney , _Barney Stinson_ ? " , she asked again , in an almost sadistic way .  
" Okay, okay , enough! " , Robin cried , finally looking Sarah into her eyes and shaking her head as if she had no idea where to begin to explain. "I. .. I thought I had moved on. I was convinced of that. But no, I still have feelings for him. And it sucks, because I wanna feel the same way with someone else. But it's so damn hard! "  
Sarah looked at her with compassionate eyes and sat down next to Robin , rubbing her back . " Why is it so hard ? " , she asked .  
" Well , I.. I don't know . I think it's because he 's the ... ", she couldn't believe she was going to say something so personal to someone who wasn't herself. " He's the only person I have ever imagined a future with . A real future. I even imagined our kids. Can you believe it? But.. but we're complicated, we've always been a complete mess and I can't do complicated, anymore. I need stability. And Jake gives it to me. God, Jake gives me everything. He loves me while Barney, well ... I don't know ".  
" Why do you think Barney doesn't love you? "  
" We almost kissed yesterday . And after that, he told me that we should forget everything and go on with our lives . And I get why he thinks that. I hurt him in the past and I know that it's completely selfish to say but .. I thought he would have fight for me, that he would have proved to me that he was serious about me this time but he just ... gave up ".  
" So, if he proved to you that he loves you and really wants to be with you , you .. you would have dumped Jake ? " , Sarah asked .  
" I.. I don't know ".  
Sarah grinned . "So you want him fought for you and after all that , maybe he would end up losing anyway? Robin, you realize that it's completely unfair ? You're the one who has to fight for what you really want and I'm sorry but it is quite clear what-who you really want. I mean, you just said that Barney is the only person with whom you've imagined a future with. It's huge! And, if after two years away from him , and with a perfect fiancé at home, you still think that, it must mean something ".  
Robin listened to Sarah's words as if she was some kind of Messiah. " I just don't wanna get hurt and I don't wanna hurt him anymore ".  
" You'll keep doing both as long as you keep being afraid of taking a worth risk ".  
" But Barney said ... "  
" Forget what he said. Do you know how I met him ? " Robin shook her head . " Well , he and Quinn hired my band for their wedding reception . I went to his home for an interview and I saw the two of them, on that couch ... and I can guarantee that he has never looked her in the same way he looks at you. They were there in front of me , talking about vows , songs , ringbear - "  
" You mean ringbearer ".  
"No. Ringbear . And I didn't wanna know what the hell was that " . Robin looked Sarah puzzled, but she said nothing . " Anyway , they were talking about all the wedding stuff and I swear there wasn't any sparkle in his eyes. But then those sparks came back as soon as you returned here ".  
Robin was surprised by those words. " So .. you think that Barney ... I mean ... "  
" Talk to him. If he's what you want. Because he wants you ".  
Robin nodded , grateful that she did that chat with Sarah . The future Mrs. Mosby was right : she needed to talk to Barney. A serious talk . And yes, maybe Barney had mentioned to her that it was over between them , but that was before she and Jake would take a break. Now the situation was different and perhaps seeing her without that engagement ring on her finger, he would have been more willing to revisit his feelings for her.

* * *

_Hi , Barney. Listen ... I don't know why I'm telling you this but .. Robin and Jake are on a break . Apparently they had a fight and now she's standing at Ted and Sarah's ..._

_Bummer ._

_This is all you have to say about it? Really ?_

_It's over, Lil . Stinson out ._

" Do you think he's serious? " , Sarah asked Lily after reading those messages on her phone while sipping an iced tea in one of the bars of Macy's. During their shopping session, Sarah had told Lily about what had happened between Barney and Robin & Jake and Lily realized she had to intervene. She saw how much passion and love Barney and Robin were containing in themselves back in Farhampton, but she also knew that they needed to be helped to get back together. Because of that, Lily decided to send that message to Barney, informing him of the situation in which Robin was in that moment .  
"No, he's not. The problem is that he is too stubborn . Well as Robin . Believe me , everything will work out. I feel sorry for Jake, though. He's a good guy ".  
Sarah nodded. " He really is . Unfortunately he wanted to go to a war he was destined to lose from the beginning ".

* * *

The next day, Robin tried to not think about her sentimental problems and devoted herself solely to her work. For her it was absurd to even think that love had taken advantage on her career. After avoiding ( with no small effort ) an invitation to lunch by that irritating colleague Patrice who, for some obscure reason adored her in a disproportionate way , Robin headed to Rose's for lunch. It was one of her most loved places to dine, especially with Barney , since that place was directly opposite his apartment. She would have lied if she said in that moment she was going there without hope to meet him. A casual encounter with Barney would have definitely been pushing her to broach the subject of their relationship with him.

She opened the door but she didn't have time to look for a free table , that her body froze. At one of the tables there he was. Barney. And that she was happy to see him . The problem was that he was not alone. There was a blonde woman in front of him , with which he was amiably chatting and laughing . Robin took a step forward , trying not to be seen by Barney , and finally she recognized who was the mysterious woman and the discovery broke her heart. Quinn. Quinn the stripper. Quinn, that Quinn . Barney's ex- fiancée, the reason why she had to leave two years ago. Robin looked at the couple and she didn't understand what the hell it was happening. It had to be a joke. Until two days ago Barney seemed totally into her , and now ... he just moved on? In fact, he moved back to the woman he broke up with two years earlier? So what it was that supposed to mean? Was Sarah wrong? Her thoughts got interrupted as soon as the two got up from the table and headed to the exit. Robin hid behind one of the pillars that were inside the place and luckily the couple went out without any attention to her . Robin gasped looking at them through the glass door , hoping not to see both enter the building where Barney lived , because she knew that if Quinn had entered in his Fortress , it would have meant one thing only. Unfortunately, her hopes shattered in a second when she saw both disappearing behind the door of the building. Only the image of Barney in bed with Quinn, made Robin want to take the tables of Rose's and split them up against the wall . In order to prevent her Canadian side to come out from her body, Robin got out, holding back some tears . She walked toward the WWN building but she had to stop after a few steps . The vision of Barney with_ that_ woman had terribly shocked her that it almost took the forces from her. She leaned against the wall , rubbing her face and breathing heavily .  
"This is ridiculous ," she whispered , placing her hands on her hips and shaking her head. Then she took a deeply breath and went back to work, without touching food. Hunger, by now, had vanished . As well as the hope that Barney still wanted to be with her.


	11. The Last Time

**AN: ****_Today is HIMYM's last day of shooting and I'm hopelessly, irretrievably in denial. Anyway, here it is Chapter 11. The Swarkles reunion is close, very very close. I'll probably write two-three more chapters after their reunion because I wanna give them a proper end. I hope you'll like it!_**

**_V._**

* * *

Robin went back home around 7pm . She quickly greeted Ted and Sarah who were watching a boring program on television about architecture and she ran to the bedroom. She still didn't know how she managed to keep working for the rest of the day without bursting into tears and shouting her despair after watching Barney with Quinn. She lay on the bed and closed her eyes. The first image that appeared in her mind was the smile that Barney gave Quinn at the bar. God, why Quinn had to be the one that made him laugh ? Why Barney had behaved as if he was still in love with her and now he was going out with his ex, instead? Robin started to cry. All those tears that she was able to hold for an entire afternoon , finally came out and they were unstoppable. She felt the frustration and anger flow into her body. She opened her eyes flooded with tears and she took the pillow next to her and threw it against the cabinet. That move left her with a deep sense of liberation,so she rose from the bed and began to unpack it, taking the blanket , and throwing it on the ground. She did the same thing with the sheet and, for the grand finale , she took the pillow on the other side of the bed and threw it against the shelf in front of the bed , dropping the frame with the picture of the gang after the birth of Marvin .

" Hey , Robin , do you want something to ea- whoah ! " , Sarah said, entering the room and seeing the mess that surrounded it . " What happened here ? "  
Robin didn't answer, she just sit on the sheets that were on the ground.  
Sarah sat next to her. " Hey , what's wrong? "  
" You. You were wrong ", she replied , wiping her face .  
" What do you mean? "  
" Barney doesn't want me ".  
" Wait , what .. did you talk to him ? "  
" No, but I saw him with Quinn, today ."  
" Quinn..._ that_ Quinn ? "  
" Yeah , they were having lunch at Rose's .. and .. they were so happy . Barney's eyes might not shine when he looks at her, but she makes him laugh . I never saw him laughin ' like that since I came back and you know why? Because I make him miserable , that's why! I cause only suffering! "  
" C'mon , Robin , that's not true ! And they were just having a lunch , that doesn't mean .. "  
" They went back to his apartment. And I honestly doubt they went there to talk about how delicious their lunch was ".  
" I still believe that you should talk to him ".  
" Why? It's so obvious that he doesn't want me, anymore. He told me that we should move on with our lives and he was serious . Why should he choose me , anyway ? After all the pain I caused him , my indecisions , why would he want to go back down that road again? Quinn makes him happy while I make him feel like he's not good enough for me and that's not true because he's more than good enough for me , he really is! "

Robin burst into tears again and Sarah instinctively hugged her. Robin finally understood how much she loved Barney. The pain she felt when she saw him with Quinn just proved that even more. And now , now that she was able to finally admit it to herself , Barney chose another woman over her . Again.  
" Robin , you need to tell him how you feel . Seriously , you can't go on like this ! "  
"No, no . It's over ".  
" No, it's not! "  
" Yes, it is . When two people are in love with each other, it should be easy . And _this_ is not easy . It just hurt and at this point I can't deal with hurt , anymore ".

Sarah stared at her thinking about how idiots Robin and Barney both were.

* * *

" Thank you, again ," Quinn said softly over the phone .

" Nah , you do not have to thank me," Barney replied while he was lying on the bed .  
"So , see you on Sunday ? "  
" Yep ."  
"Okay . And think about what I told you ."  
" I promise . Bye ."  
" Bye ."  
Barney hung up and h put the phone on the nightstand. After two second, he picked it up again, and he went on "_posts_" and reread what Lily wrote to him the day before.

_Robin and Jake are on a break_ .

He was feeling so stupid. He wanted to do something about that but honestly , he didn't even know what he could do . He knew Robin and knew that now she was probably confused , vulnerable and certainly going to her would be a mistake. What happened in that bedroom back in Farhampton was proof of it. Sure, that awareness hadn't distracted him from asking himself why Robin and Jake were on a break . Maybe he had to do something with that ? And who of the two had decided to take that break ? In that moment he cursed himself for having replied to Lily with a stupid " _Stinson out_ ". He was everything but out of that situation , he had to know more.

* * *

Wednesday evening was usually the time when the gang met at McLaren 's. That evening, though, Robin was very happy that the work had forced to forfeit the meeting. She had no intention of seeing Barney and feel all eyes on her because she was pretty sure that everyone was aware of what was happening .

" Robin , the journalist who has to hand you the documentation about that sport service is here ," said Patrice entering Robin's office .  
" Perfect, let him come in ".  
" He's so handsome , you should invite him to a date!"  
" JUST DO WHAT I ASKED YOU , PATRICE ! "  
Patrice obliged and Robin's heart almost stopped when the reporter entered . " Jake ? "  
" H-hi ", he greeted her , visibly nervous . " I'm so sorry , I should have told you but then I didn't know if ... "  
" No, um .. that's okay ".  
" You sure?"  
" Yes ".  
The two sat down at the desk of Robin . It was so strange to her. She hadn't seen Jake since Sunday and after that day , though it was hard to admit , Robin hadn't thought about him that much. Of course, she had thought about how that situation was unfair towards him and how he didn't deserve this, but she hadn't thought of _him_. But now, having him there in front of her, almost reassured her . Jake was a certainty , she knew that with him there would be no drama or anything else, that in the two years they had been together, she never found herself throwing pillows against the cabinets. And it was in that moment that a shy smile appeared on her face , thinking that maybe that was the way things were going from the begin with. Jake and Robin , Barney and Quinn .  
"So , how have you been ? " Jake asked , interrupting her thoughts .  
" I've been busy here at work .. ," she replied , knowing that what Jake really wanted to know was something else . " Nothing else happened ".  
A sign of relief popped up on Jake's face . " Yeah , same ."  
Robin smiled .  
" Okay, so .. this is all the documentation , plus some notes taken by me and here is the list of sources ."  
" It seems perfect, thanks ".  
" Okay .. um .. maybe I should go , now ".  
" Yeah .. "  
The two got up . " It's nice seeing you again ," Jake said, smiling .  
"Same for me" .  
"Listen , I know this is probably crazy but ... do you... do you have plans for tomorrow ? "  
" Oh , Jake ... I.. well , um .. I don't know ... "  
" Forget it , I'm such an idiot . I should give you time and space and instead I'm here asking you out and - "  
"I have no plans for tomorrow ", she interrupted him . In the end there was no reason why she would not have hang out with him. Until few days ago he was her fiancé. On the other hand , Barney moved on and forgot about her. Jake was shocked, in front of her , watching her adoringly after hearing what she just said.  
" Oh . Um, great! So that means you would go out with me ? Just a simple dinner , nothing else . I promise ".  
" Yeah , I'd love to ."  
"Great . So . I'll call you later , or tomorrow!"  
Robin smiled, noticing the awkward nervousness about him. " Can't wait!"

* * *

The elevator ride seemed to Barney longer than normal . After careful thought , he had come to the conclusion that he would have to talk to Robin . Just not in a too intimate as a bedroom , of course. A place where both would talk without ending up in the most absolute weirdness . That's why he decided to go to the WWN . He knew that he would find her there, after hearing Ted and Marshall talking about her job at McLaren 's, half an hour before .  
" Excuse me , I've got a thing ", he said immediately after hearing those words .  
" What thing ? ", Marshall asked .  
" Um , a social life ? " Barney replied , as if it were a matter of course .

A little sound marked the arrival of the elevator to the floor where Robin worked . Barney had no idea what he would say to her, and he didn't even know if she wanted to talk to him after what he had said that evening at the beach. But now he no longer had anything to lose, it was right to try. Barney didn't have time to approach Robin's office that the door of it opened. Barney stopped when he saw Robin appear . With Jake . He looked at them cheerfully talking and whoah, now she was hugging him. And that would be a couple on a break ? Or worse, maybe they got back together, already? Barney wanted to slap himself because he had spent the last few days pondering whether to go Robin would have been the right thing to do and, while he was thinking about it, Jake was on his way to win her back. But the thing that hurt Barney the most was to see how Robin was absolutely serene. Sure, he certainly didn't want to see her desperate or sad, but deep down he hoped that the reason for the break between her and Jake was due to the fact that she still felt something for him. After all, she told him she loved him and he knew that she was sincere . But, as usual,he was right: he wasn't worth the risk. Barney turned around and walked away.  
"This is the last time" , he thought, before taking the elevator. The descent seemed endless to him.


	12. Helter-Skelter

**AN:_ I'm still trying to recover from Monday's episode, sigh. Anyway, I tried to not think about it (but I failed, I'm thinking about it even right now). So, Chapter 12! We're close to Barney&Robin's reunion, finally! Your patience will be finally rewarded. Don't miss the next chapter._**

**_Thank you all again for the reads&reviews!_**

**_V._**

* * *

" Are you sure you wanna do this? ", Ted asked Robin, who was staring at the mirror before leaving for her date with Jake .  
" For the sixth time in the last minute, yes, I am ", she replied sarcastically .  
Sarah rolled her eyes . She was so contrary to the decision of Robin to go out with Jake , but she knew that she wouldn't be able to make her change her mind.  
" Ok , I'm going ", Robin said, taking her purse and opening the door.  
" Have fun ", Ted said.  
" I will ", Robin replied.  
" Yeah , sure ", Sarah whispered while she was reading a magazine on the sofa.

Robin arrived at the _Four Lights_, one of the most renowned restaurants in New York, and there she found Jake who was waiting for her.  
" Hey ", he greeted her .  
" Hey ".  
" You are beautiful ".  
Robin smiled . " Thank you ".  
"So, are you ready ? "  
"Yes , let's go ".  
"After you ".  
When they entered , Robin couldn't believe her eyes . Since she arrived there, something was telling her that this place was not new to her , and when she saw the inside of it , everything became clear. That was the restaurant where she and Barney had dinner several years ago. It was 2008 and Robin was looking for a turning point in her career, and Barney was the one who gave her the courage to apply for a job that was quite interesting.  
" Promise you'll apply," he said to her, during that dinner . And Robin had listened to him. Barney had been so strangely kind to her throughout the evening , and although at first she felt quite weird with that strange version of her friend, during the course of the evening she realized how she felt confortable with him to talk about her herself, her job, her fears. She liked him. End of story. But she couldn't allow herself to develop feelings for Barney , it would have been absurd and just wrong. It was for that reason that se launched that hot waitress in his arms . That was the only way she had to remind herself that Barney was nothing less than an inveterate womanizer who would never have chosen her over some bimbos . And it worked because Barney didn't bat an eyelid when she showed up at the bar along with April . He had not run after her after she had left them alone . But how wrong she was, instead?

* * *

August 2009.

It was a hot summer day and , as usual, Barney and Robin found themselves tangled on each other for the umpteenth time . Since they had kissed in the hospital , the two had spent more time they could together. Both were amazed at how easy it had been up to that point, as it was easy to be together, laugh, talk , spend most of their evenings drinking scotch , smoking cigars , watching movies and having sex. And that summer day, it went exactly that way . They were lying side by side in Barney's king- size bed , still panting .

" That was ... amazing ! " Robin said , rubbing her hand across his chest .  
" Yeah , indeed! ", Barney said , proud, holding her .  
" Wow, you know.. sex made me hungry ".  
" Well , I have some cream in the fridge ... if you know what I mean ," he said , smirking .  
Robin laughed . "Even if I'm not opposed to that , it would be nice doing something different , sometime ".  
" Whoah , attention : Robin Scherbatsky wanna do something _nice_ . I didn't even know you would be able to say that word ".  
Robin looked up to cross Barney's gaze. " What is that supposed to mean? I do a lot of nice things like ... um ..." , she bit her lower lip and Barney looked at her amused . " Um .. well .. DAMMIT, BARNEY ! "  
Barney laughed smugly. " I know you too well , Scherbatsky ".  
" Yeah , you do ", she said , softly. It was true. No one knew her better than Barney. And that scared her at the beginning but slowly she realized that she was a lucky person to have someone by her side who understood her that way and didn't judge her, even though she had no idea how it could have ended between her and Barney. The idea of losing him was hurting her because , although she was not ready to admit it, she was falling for him . But she had decided not to think about what would happen. They were not even a couple, at that time. It would have been absurd to think about things like feelings and the future.  
Barney reached Robin's hand which was still lying on his chest and began to rub it with his fingers . " Four Lights ", he suddenly said.  
" What? " , Robin asked in confusion .  
" Dinner , tonight . I suggest to go there , what do you say ? "  
" Where's this place ? "  
" We've been there last year , remember ? That night you were freaking out because I was acting super - nice ."  
" Oh, yes, right! I love that place . Aw, I thought I was in the middle of a real case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, that Night ! "  
" Too bad neither of them were able to take you home, anyway ".  
Robin became serious and looked at him straight in the eyes. "Wait , that's why you were so weird ? "  
" Yes , but apparently I didn't do a good job since you threw me into the arms of that waitress ".  
" Well, you hadn't pulled back ".  
" Hey , I had just been rejected by the woman I wanted, I needed to be comforted ! "  
Robin snorted . " Yeah , right. But, just for the record, I didn't reject you. I was just.. confused and scared. I mean, having feelings for Barney Stinson wasn't something I wrote in my plans ".  
Barney nodded , looking down . " But.. you're happy about your change of plans, right ? " , he asked softly, looking up and staring at her.  
Robin leaned to kiss him . She had never been able to resist Barney's vulnerability. Despite he seemed a typical self-confident alpha male with a bloated ego , deep down he was a sweet, fragile man. The fact that he had left Robin the chance to see that part of him , it was something that surprised her and made her immensely happy . Robin's lips finally touched his for a long , tender kiss .  
"Hmm , I take this as a yes ", Barney said, kissing her. Few seconds later, he found his body on top of hers, again . Dinner could wait a little longer.

* * *

" Hey , Robin , you're still here ? ", Jake asked , bringing her to reality.  
" Um , yes , yes ".  
"Okay, let 's go to our table ."  
" You go, I'm gonna go to the bathroom, first ".  
" Okay . Sure you're okay?"  
" Yeah, yeah . Sure . I'll be right back ".  
" Okay ".  
Robin went into the bathroom and she leaned against the wall . Suddenly she felt like in that moment she saw Barney and Quinn going in his apartment. Her breathing became labored and she closed her eyes, trying to calm down. All those things that were happening to her , the signs of the universe or whatever they were, they were making her crazy . It was as if every time she tried to get away from Barney , something brought her back to him . What kind of sadistic game was that? Robin inspired and exhaled deeply. After a few minutes, her breathing finally became regular, again. Before going out , she looked at herself in the mirror.  
" Keep calm , Scherbatsky . You can do it ", she said.  
Robin came out of the bathroom but she was still visibly shaken. Her mind was still fixed on all the signals that had haunted her until that moment . Her momentary distraction made her bumping her into a man who was entering the man's restroom.  
" Sorry ", she apologized , turning to face the person she had just bumped into. It was at that moment that she wanted to sink into a black hole and never come out of it again. The game had reached the height of its sadism .  
The person she had bumped into was Barney and now he was looking at her,visibly surprised to see her there.

" Hi ", he greeted her, seemingly calm.  
" Hi ", she replied nervously. " W - what are you doing here ? " , she asked , trying to hide a certain curiosity , hoping that he was not there with Quinn. She wouldn't hold the vision of Barney with her in a place that was so them.  
" It's my mom's birthday . I'm having dinner here with James and Sam ".  
" Oh, so Sam's here , too? "  
" Yes, he and my mom got back together. Pfft , my father was so much better ", he said, irritated by the fact that his mother had chosen James's dad over his.  
" But he's already married ", she pointed out.  
" Yeah , so what ? " , He asked, irritated.  
Robin shook her head. " Anyway .. that's great ," she said , not hiding the embarrassement about the whole situation.  
Barney nodded and with the corner of his eye he saw that Jake was looking at the menu of the restaurant at one of the tables . " And it seems like they're not the only ones who got back together ".  
Robin turned to see what Barney was looking at and she understood. " Well , there's no reason to not to , right ? " , she asked , turning back to him, trying to coax the slightest reaction from him.  
" I guess so ", he replied , his eyes fixed on her , holding back the urge to tell her that he was the reason for which they shouldn't be together. But he was so mad at her, in that moment. How she could be in their place with him?  
" And what about you , you got back together with someone ? " , she asked , vaguely angry.  
Barney looked at her surprised by the question . " No, why are you asking me that? "  
Robin wanted to take the face of Barney and sink it in one of the cakes that were on the dessert cart that was now passing near them. How could he lie so blatantly in her face ?  
" No reason ", she replied , pretend to not knowing about him and Quinn. " Well , enjoy your night ," she finally said , cutting off the conversation.  
" Yeah , you too ," he replied , coldly .

Robin made her way to the table. Robin sat down in front of Jake and smiled at him.  
" Hey ", he said, " I thought that someone had kidnapped her in that bathroom ". Robin was relieved because he hadn't noticed the presence of Barney. At least one drama was avoided.  
She smiled at him . " No, it's just that every toilette was occupied. It 's true that women have a weak bladder ! ", she said nervously.  
Fortunately, the waitress arrived with a bottle of red wine which helped Robin to calm herself a little.  
Jake looked at her deeply. " I'm really happy you're here ".  
Robin looked down, thinking she was an idiot. She had spent the last few days crying, suffering over Barney and instead Jake was there for her, despite everything. He would never make her suffer. Of course, most likely this was due to the fact that she was not into Jake so much to allow him to make her suffer , but in the end , what would be better ? Try in vain to reach someone who she might not have ever had, or be with someone who would give her security and stability?  
" Jake ", she said suddenly , looking up and crossing his gaze , "Listen .. is it really necessary to wait until Sunday ? For the decision , I mean ".  
Jake looked at her incredulously. " No, I mean.. I thought you needed time .. so .. "  
" Well , what do you say if we see each other tomorrow evening ? ", she asked , grabbing his left hand which was on the table .  
Jake smiled. "It would be great ".

* * *

It was 7pm on Friday evening. Robin had already packed her bag while Ted and Sarah were chatting in the living room with Lily and Marshall , waiting for Sarah's best friend , Kelly, and her new boyfriend, for dinner.

" So, I'm ready to go ", Robin said, leaving the room with a suitcase in tow.  
Sarah and Lily looked skeptical at her . Both knew what Robin was doing was due to the fact that , once again , she was afraid to be happy. Robin noticed the incriminating looks on her friends' faces and tried not to give too much attention to them.  
The doorbell rang and Ted went to open it .  
"Hello ! ", Kelly said with a dazzling smile.  
"Hey ," Ted said , hugging her before she went into the house to greet the others and meeting Robin for the first time . " And you must be Nick ," he said , noticing the presence of a tall, dark man and he swore that that face was familiar. And finally , he realized. " Oh my god , you're Crush Guy! "  
" Sorry , who? " Nick asked , not understanding what he was referring to.  
" Oh my god , it's you ! " Robin interjected , appearing behind Ted .  
" Robin? I can't believe it , the world is really small ! " Nick exclaimed , hugging Robin . " How are you? "  
" Fine .. what about you ? "  
"Great ".  
" You know , it's kinda weird .. I mean , I had a huge crush on you in the past .. "  
" Yeah , we all know that ", Ted interjected annoyed , knowing that Robin was fascinated by Nick since she had seen him in that sell-off in 2006 , when she and Ted were still together.  
" Hey you , don't stay at the door , come in ! ", Sarah said from the living room . Nick followed the advice.  
" Well , actually , I should go ," Robin told Ted , noticing the arrival of the cab . " Bye , guys ", she cried , so the others could hear her. Everyone returned the greeting.  
Ted smiled at her . " Are you sure this is what you want ? " , he asked softly , before closing the door.  
" Yes , I'm sure ", Robin said , trying to be convincing not only with Ted , but also with herself.  
" Okay ".  
" Thanks for everything ".  
Ted smiled . " You're welcome ".  
" Okay, so .. see ya ".  
" See ya ".

Ted closed the door and joined the others at the dining table.  
" Oh, hey, Barney will join us, today? ", Kelly asked .  
" No, actually.. we barely see him , lately ", Lily replied .  
" Oh, too bad . He's a funny guy , despite what happened in the past ..", Kelly said , remembering in the past she had fallen in one of his plays . But, after Sarah and Ted got together, she had discovered a new part of Barney and they had become almost friends.  
" Who's Barney ? ", Nick asked .  
" A friend of ours ," Ted replied , showing him the picture of the gang hanging on the wall .  
" Oh, I know that guy ! " Nick said .  
The others looked surprised by that statement . "Really ? ", Kelly asked.  
" Yes. Yesterday morning he came into my travel agency to withdraw two tickets to White Flowers that my colleague booked for him few days ago ".  
" White Flowers? ", Kelly asked , not understanding .  
" Yes , White Flowers is one of the most famous villages in the world known to be a destination for wedding ceremonies ", Lily said.  
Nick nodded . "Exactly , and he asked specifically for the wedding package , so I thought ... "  
The room suddenly became silent . Lily , Marshall, Ted and Sarah looked to each other, knowing that they couldn't let Barney get married. At least, not with Quinn. He had to be with Robin, it was so obvious that those two still loved each other . But what could they do? The only person who could make him change his mind was now on her way to the apartment of her ex- fiancé , decided to wear again the engagement ring he bought to her.  
"When he's supposed to take the plane ? " , Sarah asked Nick , breaking the silence.  
" Today at 9pm ".  
Sarah looked at Lily. " We need to call her ".  
" I'm already typing her number ". Lily replied , with the cell phone in her hand .


	13. Never Let Me Go

**AN: _Here we go. It's time for Barney and Robin to get back together, y'all! Thank you all for your patience and I hope you enjoy this chapter. _**

**_Important: this is not the end of the story, I planned three more chapters (yes, 16 chapters.. like 16 nos, step 16.. I'm such trivial), so.. don't leave me, yet!__  
_**

**_V._**

* * *

Robin arrived at Jake's after what seemed like the world's fastest taxi ride ever. The phone rang three times during the journey but, after seeing that the calls came from Lily , she had decided not to answer. She knew that her friend would try to dissuade her from getting back together with Jake and Robin certainly didn't need anyone to confuse her already confused mind. She had also received messages, always by Lily, but she hadn't read them .  
Robin knocked on the door and Jake immediately opened it, greeting her with a smile.  
" Hi ", he said.  
" Hi ".  
" Come in " .  
Robin went into the house and for her it seemed a place in which she was setting her feets for the first time. She felt uncomfortable and didn't have to feel that way, especially because she would have come back to live in there .  
" It's just so great having you here again ", Jake said .  
" Yeah , it is ", Robin replied , remaining rigid in front of him .  
" So , how it works , now ? I mean, we have to talk or ... "  
" Yes, no. I.. I don't know. It's something new for me ".  
Robin 's cell phone rang again . She sighed as soon as she saw it was Lily, again.  
" Who is it ? ", Jake asked .  
" No one ," she replied , interrupting the call. " So , let's talk ."  
" Okay, well .. I'll go first . Robin , I just want to tell you that I missed you so much. I spent days fearing that you'd called me saying that you decided to end our relationship permanently because you were still in love with .. _him"_. Robin gulped. "I 'm really glad my fears were unfounded and that you chose me above everyone else, once again ".

Robin was touched by those words. Jake seemed genuinely happy and excited, but his tone of voice was telling her that he had really suffered their temporary break. Jake loved her, it was indisputable. Jake loved her so much that he was willing to forget that his fiancée still had feelings for her ex, he was willing to start over with her because he wanted to live a life with her. And Robin couldn't help but feel safe and protected by those certainties .

" Oh , Jake ... I'm so sorry for all the pain I have caused you these days. It was not my intention, you know that you mean so much to me. But I got confused, so many things have happened and at one point I thought I was gone insane ! "  
" It's okay, the important thing is that you're here , now ", Jake said, getting closer to Robin and putting his hands on her hips .  
Robin 's cell phone rang for the umpteenth time .  
" You've got to be kidding me", she murmured , pulling out her cell phone from the pocket of her jeans.  
Jake broke away. "I think you should answer ".  
" No, it's nothing important ".  
" C'mon , we've all night . Answer , please ".  
Robin stared at Jake . " Okay, I'll be right back ".

* * *

She went out of the apartment and answered the phone.

" Lily , what do you want ? I 'm in the middle of something ! "  
" Well , get yourself out of that middle because you are making a mistake! "  
" I appreciate what are you doing but you need to stop, now, okay? This is my life, I am responsible for my own actions and no one and nothing are gonna make change my mind ".  
" Barney 's gonna get married ".

Robin froze, remaining speechless. What did it mean that Barney was getting married ? In that moment she felt the same feelings she had when two years earlier he and Quinn showed up at Lily and Marshall's apartment, announced their engagement. Back then , Robin felt the world crashing down on her shoulders; every dream, every hope, shattered at the sight of the engagement ring Quinn was wearing. It might seem like a selfish speech but Robin, despite everything, was convinced that Barney would never want to get married, that she would never have lost him because of another woman. Instead, that what was happening. And now, two years later, history was repeating itself . With the same characters . And the same emotions.

" I.. I, I mean .. what .. wh .. when ? "  
" He bought two tickets to White Flowers at Nick's agency . They're gonna leave at 9pm from JFK airport ".  
Robin tried to remain calm, especially because she was at Jake 's and now she had made her decision . She was getting back with him.  
" Well , good for them ", she said. Her voice was broken. The feelings she felt at that moment weren't possible to control.  
" Good for them ? Robin, for the love of God , stop acting like this isn't killing you! You love Barney and he loves you! "  
" No, he doesn't ! ", Robin exclaimed , in a higher voice than the one she wanted to use . " Listen , he doesn't love me, okay? If he really loved me, he wouldn't marry Quinn ".  
" He wants to marry Quinn because he can't have you , don't you get it? It's just like two years ago! And back then you had to move away because you couldn't stand the idea of seeing him married to her! "  
" Yes , right . That was two years ago. Time has passed . Let it go , Lily ".  
Lily began to lose patience. It wasn't possible that Robin was so stubborn.  
" Okay , I'll let it go if you now tell me that you'll be fine seeing Barney and Quinn together. And married. If the idea of them being in the same house , in the same bed , doesn't hurt you ".  
Robin tried to behave as if none of that bothered her. She bit her lip, trying not to let the tears appearing on her face, but damn, it was hard. The idea of Barney and Quinn married, cuddling in bed... it wasn't something easy to accept.

It hurt.

Like a knife in her heart.

" Stop it ! ", Robin cried.  
" If what you feel for Jake is stronger than what you feel for Barney .."  
" Lil , please .. " , she begged , on the verge of tears .  
Lily ignored her friend and continued. " If that almost kiss in Farhampton wasn't the best thing that happened to you in the past two years .."

Robin gave up and burst into tears. That almost kiss was the most exciting that had happened to her in a long time. The love, the passion, the desire she felt for Barney was something she could never feel for anyone else in the world. It was not a coincidence that, after their breakup , Robin sorrounded herself of people like Don, Kevin and Jake . Men who weren't remotely comparable to Barney but rather, were just the opposite. With them there wasn't that mix of emotions that there with Barney. If the mix was not there, Robin knew that she could never fall in love with them. And so, she would not have risked suffering.

" C'mon Robin , tell me that and I'll let it go ! ", Lily exclaimed , interrupting Robin's thoughts.  
Robin shook her head, still in tears . "Lily , I.. I don't know what to do ", she said , confused .  
" Be happy, that's what you have to do ", Lily replied , softly ,hearing her crying .  
Sarah took the phone from Lily's hand. " Robin, you'll lose him . And it will be forever , this time. You had a second chance, don't waste it ".  
The thought of losing Barney again did nothing but increase the tears on Robin's face.  
" Robin ... what the hell are you doing there? " Sarah asked. " Go get him! "  
Robin wiped her face and took a deep breath . "I've to go , now ".  
" Robin .. "  
" See you later, bye", Robin cut off the conversation and hung up the phone.

Robin noticed that her hands were shaking. She was in panic. All the certainties that she had up to a minute ago.. well, they were suddenly gone. Plus, Jake was waiting for her in the apartment to  
celebrate their reunion . She went back in, and Jake, who in the meantime had been sitting on the couch , stood up when he saw her enter.  
" What happened? " , he asked worried, noticing that Robin was avoiding his gaze.  
She rubbed her forehead and looked up, trying to give a sincere smile to Jake .  
" Nothing ".  
" It seems like you've been crying, that's not nothing ".  
" Trust me. Everything's fine . So , where were we? " , she asked , trying to act like she was really okay.  
" Oh. Well, we were getting back together ", he said , smiling hopefully. " And ... forever , this time " .

_Forever, this time_ .

The same phrase that Sarah said to her earlier.

Robin's breath increased.

_You'll lose him_ .

No, no, no. She couldn't allow that to happen. Sarah was right, she wouldn't have had a third chance.

Jake was looking at Robin, waiting for some reaction from her. " Robin, are you okay? "  
She just looked at him, not knowing how to say the truth. Then, she shook her head , while a few tears began to reappear on her face.  
" I. . No . I can't marry you ", she finally said.  
Jake was shocked . " Excuse me? "  
" I.. I can't marry you . I just can't. Your fears were founded ".  
" So , you're saying .. that you want to be with _him_? "  
Robin nodded slowly .  
" I can't believe it. One minute ago we were close to our reunion and now .. ", Jake looked at Robin incredulous . "Why you said you wanted to get back with me , then ? "  
" Because I thought that was the right to do. You 're sweet , caring, you make me feel like I'm the only woman that matters in this world, so I thought that maybe, one day, I would have woken up and suddenly I wouldn't have been in love with him, anymore . But... it never happened . I deluded you and myself that it actually happened .. but it's not true. I can't fall out of love with Barney. And.. I don't even want to ".  
Robin felt tremendous guilty in saying those words to Jake , who was looking visibly broken and hurt.  
"So , this is it , huh? ", Jake asked , crossing his arms , trying to hold back the tears .  
She nodded . "You have no idea how much I'm sorry for - "  
" Robin, stop. I don't need to hear anything else ".  
" Okay. I should go , now ".  
Jake nodded . " Yeah , maybe you should " .

Robin took the trolley and went out from the apartment. For the last time . And the fact that the first feeling she felt was relief, made it clear to her that she had made the right decision . But now the problem was another. Now she had to think of what to say to Barney. But she would have thought about that during her way to the airport.

* * *

Robin got out of the cab , running regardless of the rain that was heavy pouring on her, wetting her completely. She found herself inside the airport , heading for the check - in. Fortunately, her turn came almost immediately.

" Hi , one ticket to White Flowers , please ".  
" Okay, let me check ".  
Robin was so nervous , she couldn't stop moving. Among other things, she had no idea what to say to Barney, yet, even though She had thought about that all the way to the airport.  
" I'm sorry , but there are no seats available" .  
" What? But .. I. . When is the next flight ? "  
" Unfortunately there will not be next flights until tomorrow evening ".  
" No, no . You don't understand. I need to be on that damn plane ! I need to stop a wedding ! "  
" What a noble thing ".  
" Are you sarcastic ? "  
" The queue behind you is growing ".  
Robin grinned and left the row. She was angry with herself , she wouldn't have to wait so long for leaving Jake and going back to Barney. Again, the timing was against her. And now she was there ,  
wet and desperate, leaving the row. But as she was about to abandon any hope , her eyes lit up. She saw Barney. He was going through the corridor . Robin began to run in his direction. That was  
her last chance and she would not have wasted it.  
"Barney ! Barney ! " , she screamed.  
Barney stopped and when he turned toward her, he was shocked .  
" Robin ?! "  
" Barney! Oh , thank God you're still here ", she said, out of breath, catching him up .  
" What .. what are you doing here ? "  
" I need to talk to you , and I need to do that before you leave . Why are not you on the plane , tho ? Well , it doesn't matter right now ".  
Barney looked at her puzzled. " On the plane ? "  
" Yeah, don't act like I'm stupid. I saw you with Quinn at Rose's the other day. And I know you're going to go to White Flowers with her to get married ! "  
Barney finally understood what she was talking about. " Robin .. "  
" Please , let me finish ! I know that I have not behaved good with you, okay ? I've been stupid , cowardly and indecisive but.. you have to understand that you mean so much to me . You mean_ too_ much . And get back with you was the thing I wanted the most but what would happen if it wouldn't work, again ? I couldn't survive another break up with you ", a few tears began to appear on her face. God , just the idea of losing Barney because of another break was enough to make her cry .

Barney 's eyes became lucid . He had been waiting to hear those words from Robin from an infinity of time . And now he was hearing them , but he couldn't say anything because Robin was crying and he couldn't bear the sight of her in those conditions. He just wanted to hug her, but he let her finish her speech.

Robin wiped her face. " I was scared of taking the leap . I can't do this _will they/won' t they_ thing with you , anymore. I need confirmations , I need stability. I want something that will last , I'm ready for it ! But I don't know if you are, too .. and if you're not, I don't know what is gonna happen to me because yes, it 's true that I want something serious, but only if I can have it with you. If I can't have it with you, I won't have it with anyone else, then! "

Robin felt vulnerable as she had never been before. She just admitted all those thoughts that she was not able to say in the past years, and this gave her a sense of lightness. But she also felt scared, worried, because she didn't know how Barney would react . Maybe he would just smile sweetly telling her that he appreciated her words but it was too late.

God .

What if it was really too late ?

Robin began to get nervous, while Barney continued to look at her, as if he couldn't believe what he just heard .

" Is it my turn to talk, now ? " , he finally asked .  
" Yeah ", she confirmed , with a faint voice .  
" Okay. First of all, I'm not going to White Flowers. And surely not with Quinn ", he said , quite amused by the situation.  
Robin was puzzled and looked at him in shock. " Wh .. what ? "  
" Those two tickets are for my mom and Sam , since they decided to get married , I bought them as a gift for my mom's birthday ".  
Robin wanted to collapse. " So , you're .. you're not getting married ? " , she asked , incredulous.  
Barney chuckled. " Not at all ! "  
She took a moment to absorb the information. Sure, she was relieved, but she still had some questions for him.  
" But .. what about Quinn ? "  
Barney inhaled . " I casually met her at Rose's while I was having lunch and .. that's all ".  
" That's all ? Oh, no way , Stinson . I saw you both going back to your apartment ".  
" Yes , and you know what we did ? We - wait for it - talked . We just talked ".  
" Talked ", Robin repeated , rather skeptical .  
Barney smiled tenderly . " Trust me. Nothing happened ", he said , in the most serious tone he had.

Robin realized that Barney was sincere . And in that moment , she felt really stupid . She had staged the melodramatic monologue for nothing. Barney wasn't going to get married. Barney didn't get back with Quinn. And now surely he wouldn't be back with her either , after having given proof of her idiocy . Well , to be fair , it was Nick's fault too . He assumed that those tickets were for Barney and Quinn despite the fact he did not have any proof of that. But he wasn't there to take the blame . She was .

" Oh my god , I'm such an idiot , I just thought that you were.. and Quinn.. and instead.. and all I said.. oh, now you'll think I'm crazy ! " , She said , putting her hands over her face.  
Barney grinned . " Well , I've known from a while that you're crazy .. "  
" I can't believe it , I made an ass of myself for the millionth time! "  
" Robin .. "  
" I'm the dumbest woman on earth ! I was here saying my insane speech and who knows how much you laughed inside you and - "  
" Robin .. "  
" Great. Now you probably realized how much stupid - "  
" Robin .. "  
" .. I am and you will probably run away from me after this and - "

Barney didn't let Robin finish her sentence . He cupped her face with his hands and kissed her. Robin's hands clutched his arms. The feeling of Barney's tongue touching hers, sent a shiver down her spine. Finally it was happening. That kiss so desired, long-awaited , finally was happening. A sweet, tender, kiss full of love. A kind of kiss that was not exactly typical of them, but now both were ready to swear that it was the best damn kiss they'd ever had.

Barney broke the kiss , his hands still cupping her face . " I will not run away from you . I could never do that ", he said , with a sweetness that Robin couldn't believe was possible.  
Barney leaned his forehead against hers and rubbed his thumbs over her cheeks . " I love you ", he finally said.  
A big smile popped up on Robin's face . "Even if I'm crazy ? "  
" Especially because you're crazy ", he replied , laughing .  
Robin bit her lower lip . " I love you, too ", she said. How easy was saying those words to the right person .  
Barney broke away. " Do you wanna know what Quinn and I talked about that day ? "  
" What? "  
" You ", he replied , touching gently Robin's shoulders.  
Robin looked at Barney surprise. " Me ? "  
Barney put his hands on her waist. " Yeah . When we were at the bar , I told her what happened between us and that even if I loved you, I needed to let you go . But she said I was an idiot and that she would have helped me to win you back , if it was necessary ".  
At these words , Robin smiled. " Barney ..." she whispered , touching Barney's suit coat lapel.  
" Yeah ? "  
" Never let me go ".  
Barney pulled her closer to him . " Let you go ? Robin , no matter what I thought , I'm sure I would have done the possimpible if you 'd gotten to November 21st still engaged to him . I swear I would have done it ".  
Barney kissed her again with much more passion . He wanted to make her feel how much love he had for her and how happy he was that she acted that crazy just for him. Robin's hands reached Barney's jaw line and she began to feel the desire increasing through her whole body. But the same was for Barney.  
" Let's get out here ", he suggested , between kisses .  
" Yeah, that 's a good idea ", she replied , smiling languidly.

They got out of the airport, holding hands. They will never let the other go, this time.


	14. Challenge Accepted

**AN: H****_ere it is almost 4 am and I can't sleep (ouch) so.. _**_Chapter 14 is here! I hope you'll like it! The part where Robin talks about "Hopeless" is actually in the episode. Since we never had an explanation of why she was so happy after meeting Nick, I gave my own headcanon. _

* * *

The last time they were together on Barney's king- size bedroom was two years ago. Back then , the passion and the love they felt for each other were overshadowed by the guilt of having cheated on their respective partners. No matter how beautiful it was , how badly the both wanted it. It was wrong. _They_ were wrong , _their relationship_ was wrong. What they didn't realize was that in fact the only things wrong were the relationships that were carried out up to that point . They needed two years to figure it out, but finally they made it and now they were there , together again , without any negative feelings that could ruin the moment - Barney was still inside of Robin, both still still trembling after a passionate love- making. He fell on top of her , exhausted , while she was stroking his sweaty hair .

She could still feel the touch of Barney's mouth on every inch of her skin; his tongue explored every part of her body and then focused on that sweet spot that made Robin moaning loud more than once . A slow, exciting build - up, you can say. But Robin got tired soon.

" I need you , Barney. And I need you , now ," she whispered breathlessly .  
Barney couldn't do anything but to please her. Hearing those words out of the mouth of the woman he loved would have been enough to make him go over the edge . And so he obeyed her request, thrusting into her as rough as he could , until both exploded into satisfied orgasms .

" What we have just done , that alone was worth the wait ," he said , kissing her breasts before pulling away, rolling off of her. He turned his face to look over at her .  
"Totally ," Robin replied , smiling proudly , rolling into him . " But I can't help but thinking about all that times we could have done this all these years" , she added , rubbing her hand across his chest .  
" Oh , that's not a problem . We have plenty of time to recover the lost times ," he replied , holding her and kissing her hair.  
"Challenge accepted ! " , she exclaimed .  
Barney laughed . "This i s my girl! ", he said , stroking her hair.  
They both stayed in silence for a minute , until Robin took courage to talk .  
" You know , Barney .. I want this to last , I really want to ."  
" And it will . I promise ," he reassured her .  
Robin kissed his chest and both, almost simultaneously, fell asleep.

* * *

The next morning Barney woke up and, as soon as he stretched out his arm to reach the other half of the bed , he realized that Robin was no longer there . He opened his eyes in panic , and a terrible suspicion reached his brain. What if Robin changed her mind ? What if she got back to Jake , realizing that she made a mistake ? Or worse, what if he had only dreamed of being back with her? Maybe what happened the night before was just a dream. He lifted the sheets and realized he was naked , so at least it definitely was not a dream, but Robin wasn't there, anyway . Why ? All those questions were not exactly the best way to start the day. Barney was still deep in thought when he heard indistinct noises coming from the kitchen .  
He stood up immediately and, after wearing a pair of boxers , he flung himself to the kitchen . A big smile appeared on his face when he saw that Robin was there, wearing his shirt and cooking some pancakes. Barney was amazed by how she moved into his kitchen as if it were already _hers_ . It was a scene that warmed his heart - if he had to explain the concept of "family" with a scene, he would have definitely chosen the one he was seeing now.  
Robin , not having noticed the presence of Barney , put the pancakes on a plate and put it on the table. Barney walked up to her and wrapped his arms around her .  
"Morning ," he said , kissing her neck .  
Robin smiled. " Hey , morning to you ," she replied , turning her head to press her lips against his.  
" What are you doing ? Waking up and realizing that you were not on the other side of the bed wasn't very cool , Scherbatsky ."  
Robin turned to him. " I'm sorry , I just wanted to make you breakfast , like a good girlfriend would do ," she explained , touching his chest .  
"Please, you're not_ good_ ," he winked , leaning in to kiss her . " But it feels so right hearing you say that you're my girlfriend ," he added , smiling sweetly .  
Robin smiled back. " There's nothing I'd rather say , now ."  
Barney kissed her nose . " Okay, so .. let 's eat those pancakes that my beloved girlfriend made to me ."  
"Right , do you have some maple cyrup ? "  
"Sorry , are you talking to me?"  
" No, I was talking to the one -quarter canadian part of you ," she said , amused .  
Barney gave her a bad look and sat down at the table in front of her . How much he had missed her jokes about his Canadian heritage.

* * *

" You know , Scherbatsky , your pancakes are delicious and no, this time I'm not referring to your boobs", he said , after eating the last piece of the pancake .

" Oh, I'm so glad ," she replied , pleased . Then she noticed the time on the clock on the wall in front of her and her feeling of contentment vanished in a second. " Crap , I have to go," Robin said , getting up to put the dishes in the dishwasher.  
"Where ? ", Barney asked, following her.  
" Last night I was so worried by the idea that you were going to marry Quinn, that when I arrived at the airport I didn't think about anything else and so I left my trolley in the cab. So now I have to go get it back."  
" And you have to go right now? "  
" It's Saturday, and the lost property office closes in one hour. Moreover, I don't have anything to wear aside my clothes from yesterday ."  
" So just don't wear anything, I promise I will not judge you !"  
" You're an idiot ."  
" Said by the one who forgot a trolley in the cab.."  
" Oh, you know what? Now this idiot 's gonna take a shower all by herself ," she provoked. Barney looked at her, not believing any of her words.  
" I'm not a good liar, am I? ," she asked , grabbing his hand and leading him into the bathroom.  
" You're definitely not. I knew you'd give up. You can't resist a minute without the Barnacle ."  
She bit her lower lip , trying to find a sassy answer , but she just couldn't because damn, he was right . "It's true ," she said simply , before closing the bathroom's door .

* * *

"Okay , I'm ready to go , see you later ."  
"Okay ." Robin was about to move towards the door but Barney grabbed her hand . " What .. "  
"Just .. don't change your mind while you're out there ," he said , in the most serious tone that he could use.  
That vulnerability that his eyes and his voice showed , did nothing but making Robin want to forget about her clothes and everything else, because all she wanted to do was spending the rest of the day holding her man in her arms.  
" I never changed my mind about us since we got together the first time ," she said sweetly , kissing him once, twice , three times . " Are you sure about it? "  
" I don't know , maybe ... " he teased her . Robin knew he was saying that on purpose, and she kissed him again and this time both lingering . "Okay , I'm convinced now ," Barney said , his forehead resting against her , while she caressed his shoulders .  
"When I'll come back , I will convince you even more", Robin said , giving him a mischievous look.  
Barney grinned . "You little minx , I was right saying that you're not good ."  
" Yeah , you know me too well ," she said looking adorably at him , before leaving .

* * *

Barney came home after being passed to the GNB to sign some documents. He had no intention of going there , because he did not want to miss a minute of his celebration of the reconciliation with Robin , but since she wasn't at home , he decided to go there so he could finally enjoy the company of the woman he loved for the rest of the day. If she had not changed her mind in the meantime , of course. He even called Quinn on his way home, telling her that he didn't need her help anymore. They were supposed to meet each other on Sunday to study a plan, but now it wasn't necessary. He had his woman back, and he basically didn't move a finger to make that happen.

"What the ... ? " , He asked entering his apartment , noticing at least 10 boxes full of clothes , things , shoes and other stuff , lying on the floor. He walked to the bedroom and there he saw Robin , sitting on the floor near the bed, as she pulled out some shirts from another of the boxes.  
"Okay, _trolley_ has a different meaning in Canada or you didn't find it so you had to buy back all the stuff you had ? "  
Robin smiled and stood up. " I'm sorry , I knew that maybe I should have asked you before bringing here my stuff but I didn't know where else to put it. After I got my trolley back , I went to Jake .. " Barney made a grimace of disapproval. Why that guy must still be present in their lives? Ugh . " .. And I took the rest of my stuff from his apartment . I knew that he wasn't at home, so I took advantage of it . It was something I should have done sooner or later, and I decided not to wait any longer. I promise I will find an apartment soon and you won't have to be immersed in this mess for a long time , " Robin explained , hoping that Barney was not disappointed that she went to Jake or worse, that she brought all her stuff into his apartment.  
" I'm glad you no longer have your stuff at Jake's ," he stated , looking her in the eye . " But enough with these boxes , I'll take you out for lunch ."

* * *

" This place is amazing , how did you find it ? " Robin asked, looking around while they were waiting to order at their table.

" Nick told me about it some months ago ."  
" Pff, Nick ", she said, annoyed.  
Barney laughed . " C'mon , don't be mad at him . He kinda helped us to get back together ."  
" You're right ," Robin replied , taking a sip of wine, when suddenly her mind lit up. " Oh my god , you're really right ," she said , putting the glass on the table .  
" I know , I'm Barney Stinson . And Barney Stinson is alwaaaaaaays right ."  
" No, I mean .. yes , but .. now I understand why I felt so happy that night ."  
" What are you talking about? "  
" Do you remember that night we went at _Hopeless_ with your dad ? "  
" Yes , what a crazy night ."  
" Well , I met Nick there, but then Ted ruined everything saying we were engaged so nothing happened . .. But on our way home , Lily told me that she was sorry because the things didn't work out between me and him and you know what? I couldn't help but smiling . I was not sad or upset , I was actually happy . and now I know why : it was like I already knew that I would have met him again and that he would have lead me to happiness , to you " .  
Barney smiled softly . He was touched by that confession and he had to look down to hide a certain emotion .  
" You know , Scherbatsky .. " he said looking up and putting his hand on hers. "That's funny Because when my dad got back home after that Night , he told me that if I really wanted to change my life and be more like him , I just needed to meet the right girl . And right after he told me that , all I thought about was you . ".  
Robin smiled , rubbing her thumb on his hand. " You did ? "  
" Yes in fact , I even told him that maybe I've met her already" .  
" Yeah , you really did ," Robin confirmed , satisfied.  
" And I'm never let her go ," he added .  
" Don't you even dare" .

* * *

They spent the rest of the day in a perfect Barney and Robin's style. Playing laser tag, smoking cigars and then, watching a silly movie at the cinema before a quick dinner at Rose's. It has been their first official day together as couple after a long time and they couldn't be more happy. Now they hadn't to act like they were just friends.

" Thanks for today , Barney ," Robin said, entering the bedroom.  
" I'm glad you liked it ", Barney replied, kissing her. But the kiss lasted briefly, because Robin hurt her foot, touching the box that was still on the floor. " Oh , damn these boxes ! "  
"I really think that you should put them away ".  
" I know , next week I'm gonna find - "  
" No, that's not what I meant ." Robin's face was full of confusion . " I thought maybe you could empty them and put your stuff here , permanently ."  
Robin gasped . "Wait , are you suggesting that I should move in? "  
" Only if you want to ." Robin was still shocked. " And I like the idea of having you by my side every day and every night ."

The idea of living with Barney , falling asleep and waking up next to him every day , it was something that made Robin incredibly happy . She remembered how nice it has been the day that has just passed , with Barney who gave her the "good morning" kissing and holding her.

" I'd love to ," she finally said. " But are you sure you will not get tired of me?" , she asked , wrapping her arms around his neck .  
" Hmm, It seems like I am the one who has to convince you, this time ."  
" Oh yeah , I really think that's the case".  
"Challenge accepted ! "

And a few seconds later they found themselves clutching at each other, again. What a great way to celebrate the beginning of their cohabitation.


	15. Our December

**AN: _So, I skipped some months in this fic and now we're on December. How time flies! Next one will be the last chapter, and I'm planning to upload it before Monday so... stay tuned! ;)_**

**_V._**

* * *

"Hello ? " ,Barney answered the phone still asleep . " Oh my god , really? Yes , yes , we'll be there as soon as we can, stay cool bro! " , he exclaimed, hanging up.

" What is happening ? " Robin said, woken up by his voice.

" Sarah's in labor , we have to go to the hospital right now! " , he explained visibly nervous , jumping off the bed . Robin did the same thing.

" Oh my God , okay, let's go ," she said , opening the closet to find something to wear .

Barney entered the suits room . "Where's Arthur , where is it ? " , he asked .

" Who? "

"The suit I bought for this event because I must make a good impression in front of my niece ! "

Robin laughed , entering the suit room . "Barney , I don't think Penny 's gonna remember the outfit you wore the day of her birth ."

Barney chuckled. " Please . If she 's gonna have half of the memory her father has , she 's gonna even remember the day she was conceived ."

" I guess you have a point ."

" Oh, finally , I found it! "

Barney got dressed in record time and within minutes they were both ready to head to the hospital.

* * *

Barney and Robin arrived to the floor where Sarah had been admitted and found Marshall and Lily in the waiting room , while Marvin was sleeping on one of the chairs .

" Hi guys ," Lily greeted them.

" She's born? She's healthy ? She's cute ? She's a she ? " Barney asked , totally freaked out. Robin rubbed his back while her heart was melting , realizing how much Barney cared about the health of the little girl who would soon become part of their family.

" No, but it is a matter of time ," Lily said.

" Oh my god , I need a coffee ," Marshall said.

" Again? Sweetie , you've been drinking since we got here 20 minutes ago ! "

" Sorry, but my best friend 's daughter is gonna be here any minute , my caffeine overdose is justified ! "

The door of Sarah 's room opened.

" Hey ," Ted greeted the others , who were looking at him waiting to hear some news. " Um .. I'm a dad ! " , he said smiling.

"Yes ! " , The gang shouted , going to hug the new daddy. It was like being in a flashback , when two years before was Marshall the one to exclaim his paternity to the rest of the gang .

" C'mon , I wanna introduce you to my new lady ," Ted said , entering the room with the others.

" Guys , haaaaaave you met Penny ? ", Sarah said , holding her daughter in her arms.

" Oh, she's beautiful ," Robin said.

" She really is ," Lily agreed .

" Like her mom ", Ted added, kissing Sarah's forehead.

Marshall and Barney said nothing , being too busy trying to hold back the tears , and this caused laughter from the others.

The next few minutes were a follow of smiles, emotion , and joy . For the first time in two years , the whole gang was really happy .

* * *

" You really freaked out back then ," Robin joked entering the apartment after leaving the hospital .

" Well, I'm just an apprehensive uncle , that's it ! " , Barney replied .

" Yeah , sure ."

" Oh, if you'll ever get pregnant , you'll want me to be apprehensive , trust me! "

Robin froze. That was the first time that Barney was talking about a hypothetical child , _their_ child . Before that moment, that topic had not been touched in any way and this had made it difficult for her to find the right time to talk to him about her infertility. Of course , there was also an underlying fear that had blocked her by confessing her inability to have children : what if Barney wanted to have children ? What if once discovered that she couldn't give them to him , he would have had second thoughts about their relationship ? But now, those " what if" needed to be addressed, it was time . Now or never.

" Robin , are you okay? " Barney asked , noticing that Robin suddenly became serious. " Did I say something wrong? "

" No, I. .. um .. Barney , I have to tell you something ," she replied , trying to stay calm .

Barney became alarmed . What could it be ? His mind began to explore the worst cases. She cheated on him? She wanted to break up with him?

" What is it ? " , He asked , concerned .

Robin breathed heavily . " I. . I can't have kids ," she finally said , and suddenly she felt like a huge weight was leaving her body.

Barney was shocked . He said nothing , merely looking at her, open-mouthed.

" Say something ," Robin begged nervously. She needed to know what were his thoughts.

" When did you find out ? " , he asked , moving closer to her .

" After the pregnancy scare two years ago . They called me back in and they told me that I'm infertile ."

Barney finally understood the reasons for the weird behavior Robin had back then . He wondered how much she had suffered for that news, and how he couldn't stand next to her to comfort her, because he didn't know the real reason behind the sadness in her eyes . But now he was there , he was there with her, and he could give her all the love he could. So he hugged her tightly and Robin clung to him , removing any "what if" that had been present in her mind until that moment .

" I'm sorry , I should have told you that before ," she apologized , fighting the urge to cry .

" Yes, you should have ," he agreed , breaking the hug . " But not because that would have changed what I feel for you, but because if I had known earlier, I would have been there for you ," he said softly , wrapping her wraist .

Robin smiled , feeling his love . " I wanted to tell you ," she admitted , rubbing her hands over Barney's suit coat lapels . " I really did ."

" Why you didn't, then ? "

"Because .. ", damn .. that was hard to explain . "It wasn't exactly the easiest thing to say. Especially not to you ."

Barney looked at her not understanding , and so Robin took courage and told the truth .

" Um , do you remember when I got drunk on that Sunday and I told you about our kids ? "

Barney chuckled . " Yes, it's not something you can easily forget ."

" Well , I actually imagined them. Right after I found out about my.. condition, I went to Central Park and sitting on a bench and there .. I imagined to tell our children the story of how I met their father , you . But then they faded away.. and after that, I tried to avoid you because seeing you reminded me of those kids we'll never have and it hurt. The same's for that damn bench near the carousel . Everytime I step next to it , the pain is back and it looks like it makes fun of me. "

Some tears peered into Robin's eyes who was fast enough to wipe them. Barney , on the other hand, was literally shocked. Knowing that Robin imagined to have children _with him_ and that she imagined them to tell them the story of how she met him, caused different emotions in his heart. The first one was joy , because that admission was a irrefutable proof that she, despite having repeatedly said to be against the possibility of becoming a mother , would have been willing to have a family with him. The second one, however, was sadness. Sadness because Robin will never give birth to the hypothetical family who imagined during that cold December night , and Barney didn't know what to do to relieve her pain, so he just pulled her closer .

" Robin , do you want kids ? Because there are other ways if you - "

Robin shook her head . " No, I just .. I think that if I accidentally got pregnant I would be happy because I would have had _your_ kids, but .. adoption , surrogacy , all that stuff .. no."

"Okay ," he said , smiling at her .

" But .. what about you ? Do you want them ? " , she asked . There was an unquantifiable fragility in her voice that broke Barney's heart. He didn't want to see her so sad.

" Why would I want them ? I've finally got you , and that's all I need ," he said in the sweetest way he could .

Robin smiled tenderly . "You sure?"

Barney leaned to kiss her . " I am . You don't have to doubt my love for you , Robin . You're important to me more than kids, more than my suits ".

"Even Arthur ? ", she joked .

"Even Arthur ", he smiled , before kissing her again . " I love you" .

"I love you, too ."

* * *

A week had passed since Penny was born and since when Robin's confession to Barney about her infertility. He had sworn that it was not a problem not to have children , that nothing would change his mind about their relationship to him and Robin believed his words . Maybe too much because, after that, Barney began to appear more distant. Of course, he had not stopped to tell her that he loved her and they had sex regularly, but there was something weird with him and Robin had noticed it . He was nervous , and often as she spoke , his mind was absent. So it was that Robin began to suspect that maybe Barney had lied to her, that maybe it wasn't true that it wasn't a problem not to have children . Who knows, maybe he had changed his mind , maybe see his married friends with children had made it clear that he wanted to be part of that club and now that he knew she couldn't help him in that , he didn't know how to behave. The icing of the cake came during a snowy Wednesday evening, when , while waiting for Barney to come home, Robin received a text message from him .

_Meet me at the bench in Central Park near the carousel ._

Robin froze. For what reason Barney wanted to see her there ? And why on earth at that place that had caused her so much pain?

" He's gonna break up with me ," she thought , before wearing the coat and leaving the apartment .

* * *

Robin arrived to Central Park. The snow stopped falling down, but the entire place was covered by it. The last time she had seen it like that was two years ago and she immediately remembered the pain she felt back then. The funny thing (well, not that funny) was it that probably another painful memory would be reconnected to that place in few minutes . Robin joined the famous bench and found Barney already seated on it.

" Hi ," she said , visibly nervous.

" Hi ," he replied .

Robin sat down next to him.

" You're probably wondering why I asked you to meet me here ."

" Yes and honestly , your explanation better be good because I'm feeling uncomfortable ."

" I promise there's a very valid reason" .

Robin nodded , hoping That he would soon get to the point.

" So .. do you wanna tell me what's going on ? "

" Yeah , sure . It's not an easy thing to say but - "

" God , Barney. Just tell me already! " , she cried impatiently.

" Whoah , Canada. Calm down ," he said worriedly.

" How can I calm down knowing that you're probably gonna break up with me ? "

Barney 's eyes widened in disbelief. " Wh- What? WHAT? Robin , why would you think that? "

" Well , you've been acting weird for days after I told you about my infertility , so.. "

" I don't wanna break up with you , silly . God , I'm crazy but not _that_ crazy . But you are right sayin 'your infertility has a role in this situation ."

Robin was confused . "Okay ... "

Barney grabbed her hands . " I know what this bench means to you and all the bad memories it contains . I can't even imagine how you felt when you found out about your condition two years ago but I know how it feels like when you're lost. And broken . I felt that way for a long , long time . But then I met you and all the bad memories I had , all the pain and sad thoughts.. suddenly went away . You made that happen and the least I could do now is returning you the favor. When I looked into your eyes when you told me about this bench , I saw so much pain into them. And you can't be sad , I can't allow that. I wanna walk in Central Park with you and sit on this bench and see you smile . And so I've been thinking for days, and that's why I acted weird, but it was just because I needed an awesome idea and finally I found it and that's why we're here, now. I hope you'll love it as much as I love it. "

"What's the idea ? ", she asked, not knowing what Barney was having in his mind.

Barney got up and stood in front of her, pulling out a small velvet pouch from his pocket. Then he knelt down and opened the pouc that contained a beautiful engagement ring.

" Robin Scherbatsky , will you marry me? ", he asked in the sweetest way possible, with eyes fixed on her, which were looking at her nervously , hopefully .

Robin was speechless. She was open-mouthed, because she was expecting anything but that. The image of Barney on his knees in front of her with a ring was something she would never have thought to see , especially since she had arrived in Central Park that night convinced that their relationship would come to an end . Her breathing became more labored , and she felt that her eyes were ready to release tears. Not sad tears , indeed. Tears of joy . Because in the end this was what she had always wanted since they got together the first time: a life together, a serious commitment , no drama. Just pure happiness.

"Yes ," she finally replied with a big smile on her face .

Barney returned the smile and the tension went away from his face to make space for happiness. Still on his knees, his face get closer to Robin and kissed her cupping her face. Barney even had to break the kiss to put the ring on her finger before kissing her lips again and that's when he felt Robin smiling and that made him happy . Then he stood up and took Robin's hands to help her up from the bench.

" I Hope that you'll finally realize that you mean to me more than anything else in the world " .

Robin nodded and kissed him . " I love you ," she said, hugging him tightly.

"I love you, too ," he said , embracing her in turn and kissed her neck.

And it was at that moment that it began to snow again . Into the arms of Barney , Robin thought back to when she found herself alone on the bench two years ago and how that snow hurt her soul . She thought that her infertility was the signal that she and Barney were not meant to be . That their story was going to disappear just like their children. Her possible pregnancy was the only thing that could bring Barney back to her, she was sure of it . After she broke his heart by choosing another man over him , she knew he would never want to have anything to do with her again, romantically speaking . But if she was pregnant, everything could change . But no, her plan miserably failed, and drinking an Eggnog on a bench all by herself was the result. She went so far as to think that maybe she deserved it. That all the mistakes she had made and the pain ahe had caused had the right reasons for what was happening to her. But now everything changed. Now Barney was there with her. He asked her to marry him and she said yes. And that snow didn0t hurt anymore. Some tears appeared on Robin's face and Barney didn't remain indifferent .

" Hey , what's wrong? "

" Nothing ."

"Okay, friendly reminder : You can't say you're okay when you're crying because it's not credible ." Barney gently pulled her away . " Robin .. "

" I'm not crying because I'm sad . I'm just ... happy . For the first time in my life .. I feel happy ."

Barney smiled , wiping her tears . " I promise I'll try my best to make you feel that way everyday ."

Robin wrapped her arms on his neck and kissed him . It was very difficult to break the kiss , because she wanted to keep her lips against his forever .

" Barney ? "

" Yeah ? "

" Do you wanna sit on that bench, just for a while ? " , she asked almost embarrassed.

" Really ? ", Barney asked , surprised by such a request.

Robin smiled and nodded . They sat on it and Robin leaned her head on his shoulder while her left hand gripped the right of him.

" It feels nice ," she said .

" Glad to hear that. Can you promise me that from now on , you'll think about this bench as a happy place and nothing else? "

" I promise ".


End file.
